Al-Qaeda operatives have added a new weapon to their terrorist arsenal: killer cleavage.
Female suicide bombers are being fitted with exploding breast implants which are almost impossible to detect, British spies have reportedly discovered.
The shocking new al-Qaeda tactic involves radical doctors inserting the explosives in women’s breasts during plastic surgery — making them “virtually impossible to detect by the usual airport scanning machines”.
But according to Slate’s XX Factor blog, there may be a silver lining to this threat. After sharing a handful of obligatory booby trap jokes, writer Hanna Rosin asks:
Does this mean jihadi circles are becoming places where you can freely discuss sexual parts? That is actually possible.
Duh! Of course that’s what it means. At long last, Islamofascists have overcome the repressive taboo on openly discussing T and A. Next thing you know, female jihadists will be flaunting their tramp stamps and whale tails, gyrating lasciviously as they belt out, “My milkshake brings all the boys to jihad.” Wouldn’t a sex-positive global caliphate be awesome?
I realize Slate’s shtick is round-the-clock contrarianism, but the suggestion that exploding breast implants are indicative of feminist progress among Islamists is either indescribably depraved or breathtakingly ignorant.
Exploding breast implants do not signify the freedom of Muslim women to discuss their bodies in mixed-gender company. The slicing and dicing and surgical crippling of female sexuality is nothing new in the Islamic world, and in fact, the link between female sexuality and male violence is codified in Islamic scripture.
Turning women’s breasts into vessels for lethal explosives is not a sign of moderation or liberation. It’s yet another illustration of how Islam reduces women’s worth to the utility of their sexual parts.