Baseball or Cricket, U.S. or South Africa: The Lawyers are the Same

It is easy to feel a moment of anxiety or psychological disconnect while reading Sports Illustrated South Africa: The sylvan pastures of baseball are nowhere to be found; instead you have grown men dressed like really fashionable jockeys whacking balls at croquet hoops. And what’s the deal with the bat, anyway? Did they forget to finish it?

Oh, it’s called Cricket. Alrighty, then. At least the rest of it is mostly the same: There are high-profile wealthy athletes, bombshell models, and vengeful Mommies to be found in spades.

In the recent Lara Bingle Wants Her Slice Of Clarke’s Fortune, a bracing rush of familiarity is felt as the plot-line is laid out:

“The relationship is over, their dogs call separate kennels home and now the battle for Cricketer Michael Clarke’s millions is being thrashed out by lawyers, with model Lara Bingle being encouraged by her mother to fight for a fair deal.”

Thank God! For a second I thought everything was really different down there!

Stage props include an Aston Martin, a $200,000 engagement ring, and a Mumsie who could care less about the money – her daughter’s emotional state is of paramount importance.

“After having encouraged her pretty daughter to start modelling at 12 and allowing her to drop out of high school at 16 and head to Italy, Mrs Bingle has no love for Clarke.

“ ‘She feels they were never right for each other, doesn’t think he looked after Lara, being away as much as he was, and wants him to pay dearly,’ a source said. Clarke has four properties in his name including his $6 million Bondi unit and a $3 million waterfront home at Lilli Pilli.”

I know, I know. Who would think that a professional sportsman would have to travel, anyway!

The moral here of course is that even though the location may vary, people, especially those with the financial wherewithal to exercise their every whim, are pretty much the same. Or have you all forgotten this?

I for one am hoping for the same kind of reconciliation.