Anthony Weiner or a Saint?

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The reason the congressman is so eager to forgive the hacker is that there is no hacker. He cannot have an investigation for the simple reason that it will show that he posted the photograph himself.

In a panic when he saw he had hit the wrong button and sent a private tweet of his pecker to his entire Twitter following, Weiner blurted out the hacker defense, quickly typing: “FB hacked. Is my blender gonna attack me next?”

Unfortunately, there was no lawyer in the room to tell him: “Don’t say that! They’ll have to investigate!”

On Sunday, his staff followed up with a press release, saying: “Anthony’s accounts were obviously hacked.”

So he can’t now claim he didn’t say it.

After hiring a lawyer, Weiner quickly backpedaled from the “hacker” claim and began insisting, in another press release: “This was a prank. We are loath to treat it as more.”

If it was a prank, then why did he hire a lawyer?

Weiner isn’t a celebrity: He’s a CONGRESSMAN. Whoever can hack into his Twitter account may be able to hack into other congressmen’s accounts — or into Weiner’s briefing files from, say, the Department of Defense.

(Indeed, unless the alleged hacker is arrested, who knows how many Anthony Weiner penis shots could start circulating on Twitter?)

But when one of Weiner’s colleagues, Rep. Cliff Stearns, R-Fla., requested a congressional investigation into cybersecurity based on Weiner’s self-proclaimed computer attack on his Twitter account, Weiner denounced and insulted Stearns.

The best Weiner can do now is try to take his utterly humiliating penis photo out of the realm of criminal law by eliding “hacked” into “pranked.” Legally, it’s not clear what the difference is.

He’s stuck angrily announcing that he wants to move on, there’s important work to be done, and calling a CNN reporter a “jackass” merely for asking if Weiner sent the penis photo or not.

For a guy who’s suddenly taking the position that this was all just a harmless prank, he seemed pretty bent out of shape at that CNN press conference. If that condition persists for more than four hours, congressman, consult your doctor.

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  • Mark

    Of course he posted the photo…anyone with two braincells to rub together knows he did it.

  • JFS

    How can Wiener, the most vindictive and ruthless living member of the House not want to know who the hacker is? Especially since it may prove the hacker is:

    A homophobic, fly-over country Tea-bagger that shows up at Congressional townhall meetings wearing a firearm? Who is also a filthy, bitter-clinger rube who got lucky guessing and hacking his Twitter sign-in information? How can he deny himself the pleasure of not knowing if the Tea Party Express or a 9/12 organization is behind this?

    The only explanation is that this is the doing of Wiener’s own hand…… every applicable way.

  • kblink45

    I know a weaner when I see one, Mr. Wiener, and that's no weaner, that's a tweaner.

    • logdon

      An itsy, bitsy, teeny, weeny, yellow, whining, Wiener's weaner?

  • kafir4life

    Tony D. Weiner is the love child of former Speaker Pelosi and Senator Chuck (the Kapo) Schumer. Pelosi was performing a Lewinski on Schumer, and nine months later, Tony emerged from Schumers rear. That's either the method by which liberals reproduce, or Chuck was just showing Tony a good time.

  • tanstaafl

    I hate to say this, but I am informed by the fairer sex that sometimes, size does matter.

  • Cuban Refugee

    It seems there are many facets to this Weiner … I used to think this obnoxious, little man was a devoted political hack who took on the responsibility of being a duplicitous beard for Huma Abedin, Hillary Clinton's gal pal, or that he was simply one of the attack dogs who went after Glenn Beck for his Goldline ads; but, after Weinergate, I now see there is more slime to this rascally opossum than his immersion in the swamp of dirty politics. If Weiner had been a conservative Republican, an investigation into the supposed hacking of his Twitter account would have been demanded. Why is he getting off with a few superficial press conferences that served to shed light on nothing but his "prickly" attitude?

  • Okie.Patriot

    Thou dost besmirch the opossum kingdom…

  • BS77

    Let this story die a quick death….it's a bore already.

  • dirtybird

    Anyone who has seen the photo will agree that Anthony's weiner is really a small story. His sketchy behavior & cover-up is the larger story. For Anthony's sake, let's hope that an investigation gets to the bottom of this.

  • StephenD

     The real test will be if he gets re-elected by his constituents after all the deceitfulness.

  • alexander

    our elected ones quickly become gods – in their minds – and, having nothing to do, they go after women…if he were a Repub., our MSM (a.k.a. red rags) would already had eaten him alive.

  • Misfit

    who will be elected as NYC mayor in 2013! and the
    "Winner is….LONG JOHN……..WEINER!?"

  • Steve Chavez

    Barney Frank is saying, "Even I wouldn't DO that wiener!"

  • Weiner2012

    I can't criticize.

    Sometimes, as I am surfing through my carefully prepared list of social media college coeds, I too stand tall and salute this great country.

    Admittedly, I do not bend to the left, but I would be lying if I told you that I did not let Mr. Weiner make the occasional decision for me. True, Mr. Weiner's decisions are usually appalling (in retrospect), but then, why else would he be there, if not to lead – if not to go first, to bravely chart a course. To accidentally send an embarrassing picture to 45,000 people instead of one – to basically make the mother of all "reply all" mistakes – surely this is only one incident in the great human history of being led by Mr. Weiner. He'll eventually get us there!

    So – Continue on, Mr. Weiner! Pretend what you need to! Say what you need to! Because you, congressman, are surely the biggest Weiner our country has to offer.

    PS. Is your wife buying any of this?

  • Steve

    If the GOP can't force the resignation of the racist Attorney General Holder who runs his office with racist policies not unlike those of the National Socialists in early Twentieth Century, no way the GOP will be able to force Weiner out of office.

  • Supreme_Galooty

    It merely confirms what I already knew – the fellow is a total jerk.

  • fmobler

    The happiest guy in Washington this week is Barney I-had-no-idea-that-was-going-on Frank.

  • genashby

    Why is Ann kissing weiner's a$$.. ?? was that tongue and cheek.. puke