Anders Breivik Meets His Cushy Fate

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Ask anyone who’s ever visited it: Oslo is the most expensive city on the planet.  A recent article about these matters observed that “Oslo comes out so far on top in a study of 32 countries worldwide that second-placed São Paulo seems almost ludicrously cheap by contrast.” Housing being in short supply, moreover, apartments are especially pricey, whether you’re renting or buying, and the competition for them is fierce.  And, oh yes, they’re generally pretty small, if not downright tiny.

One man, however, has figured out how to beat the system.  All he had to do was brutally slaughter 77 people in cold blood and sit through a few months of tiresome courtroom proceedings.  Now he’s set for life, with what essentially amounts to a lifetime lease on a pleasant three-room apartment just outside of northwest Oslo (the fanciest part of town, no less).  Each of the rooms measures 86 square feet.  One of them is a workout room, with a treadmill and Stairmaster.  Another one is a study, furnished with a desk and laptop, where he can work on the three books he’s currently planning to write.  Though he doesn’t have Internet access, he’s able to search an offline version of Wikipedia.  He also has a free TV (he doesn’t even have to pay the annual $443 license fee like the rest of us) and has newspapers delivered daily.  You can see his digs here, though his landlords, out of an extraordinary delicate sense of respect for his privacy, have chosen not to videotape his bedroom.

There’s no kitchen, but he doesn’t need one: his landlords will provide him with three decent meals a day, take away the dirty dishes, and not expect a tip.  There’s no laundry room because they’ll do his laundry for him.  He won’t receive bills from the phone company or electric company.  He won’t have to change his sheets or mop his own floor: those things will be taken care of, too.

No, he can’t have friends in.  But so what?  This guy’s not so into friends anyway.  Nor can he go out.    But big deal – you ever been in Oslo?  For months at a time, the sidewalks on the busiest downtown streets are covered in gleaming sheets of ice.  To venture outside most of the year is to risk breaking a hip or any number of ribs.  And let’s face it, where’s there to go?  A bar, where you’ll pay twelve bucks for a half pint of beer?  Or a relatively modest restaurant, where you’ll shell out fifty clams for a lousy burger?

Besides, if he gets bored writing his books, he’ll be able to take advantage of a variety of job and educational opportunities (college courses, cooking classes), plus a range of other diverting activities, all of them right there in the same complex he’s living in – he won’t even have to go outside.  All this, explains one of his landlords, is “to compensate for his limited contact with others, and to counteract the damage caused by isolation.” Oh yes, there’s also a yard where he can walk and sit for an hour a day.  And in time, his landlords expect to provide him with access to a library and a gym, among other amenities.  As one of his landlords told Fox News, “I like to put it this way: He’s a human being. He has human rights….Isolation is torture.” Hey, I’m a writer, tell me about it.

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  • crackerjack

    Murder rate Norway 0.6.
    Murder rate USA 5.7.

    Hillarious that anyone should even contemplate Norway taking any advice from the US on how to deal with social dissorder and crime. LOL.

    • Ron Karsh

      Bruce Bawer moved to Norway to be legally married to his male partner, because it was not possible in the US to freely chose who you'd want to spend the rest of your life with, and have that choice legally and socially sanctioned. In the US: no same-sex marriage and retributive justice; in Norway: same-sex marriage and restorative justice.

      • Baby_Blue

        For the life of me I can't understand why gays aren't just satisfied to live together just like so many straights in the West who either claim they're not ready for marriage or don't believe in it. And if they want to endow thier relationship with something special then come up with some unique gay celebratory rites and "get married". This is all about undermining Christian (and other religions, for that matter) traditions and using the married state to be able to acquire various state directed benefits.

        • Banastre tarleton

          true enough …it's not about tolerance, it's about RESPECT ….they are trying to ''normalise'' abnormal sex practices into ''gay pride '' ….what's next , wankers pride , group sex pride , incest pride or maybe animal sex pri de ? sheeesh

      • Mo_

        Go live there, then.

        And stop forcing your morality on us.

      • Kufar Dawg

        I wonder if the new islamic future of Norway will be allowing same-sex marriages, or even breathing privileges for the LGBT crowd. Maybe you should ask Norway's rising muslime population what they think — seeing at they are Norway's future.

    • davarino

      There may be other factors coming into play here that you have not considered. I think comparing Norway and the USA is like comparing apples and oranges, or your brain and a normal persons brain

    • Mo_

      Remarkable, how the first comment (at least, at this writing) is someone defending a mass murderer.

    • SCREW SOCIALISM

      Norway? Ally of nazi national Socialist Germany.

      Quisling. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quisling

      Quisling (play /ˈkwɪzlɪŋ/; Norwegian pronunciation: [ˈkʋɪsˈlɪŋ]) is a term used in reference to fascist and collaborationist political parties and military and paramilitary forces in occupied Allied countries which collaborated with Axis occupiers in World War II, as well as for their members and other collaborators.

      SCREW NORWAY.

  • HermitLion

    Well, then I guess it's proven – to get ahead in Norway, one has to be a homicidal muslim… or just plain homicidal.
    The system works.

  • davarino

    So I guess it wouldnt be a big deal if one of the victims relatives killed Anders out of revenge. Then he'd get Anders apartment, sweet deal.

  • guest

    As a mass murderer, he is far behind Islam, as is satan.

    • Kufar Dawg

      On an off year muslimes probably kill more people, in the name of Islam, than Breivik ever dreamed of.

  • Schlomotion

    This article is on point. Anders Breivik was rewarded with a lifetime supply of a state college single dormitory, meal plan, word-processor and gymnasium. Throw in a daily bottle of Jack Daniels and it's a writer's paradise.

    • Advocatus

      Agreed. You are clearly no writer, but you might still enjoy one of those luxurious prison cells. Come to think of it, I could actually see landing in one as a fine career goal for you. Best of luck on that score!

  • BS77

    21 years for killing 77 people, mostly youths….and wounding many more. He should be doing hard labor in a Devil's Island type prison…….but Norway is what we now call Orwell Land. Everything is run by happy shiny faced liberal bureaucrats and other assorted new age morons…everything is upside down…the courts, the immigration, the welfare state, the taxes are insane, the endless rules and micro managed society are something straight out of science fiction. If you rebel, they put you on medication. This is what The Stepford Wives was all about. Go to Norway and become Rototized.

    • dmw

      Imagine a Viking being time transported to contemporary Norway. Perhaps Norweigians are atoning — to the extreme — for their formerly barbaric ways. Wonder what will happen when the oil runs out. And when the Muslims get to their tipping point? Easy pickings (as in, first, ticking the natives off, then, picking the natives off).

  • BS77

    Go to Norway and become Robotized.

  • AntiSharia

    That's progressive "justice" for you. The criminals get it better than the victim. They should learn a thing or two from Texas. Oh, and for the Euro weenies touting the criminal justice system of Europe as superior because of a lower crime rate, don't get too smug. The crime rate is soaring because of strict gun control(that didn't stop Brevik) and mass immigration. America, being far more heterogeneous than Europe, has a higher crime rate but its a falling crime rate, and has been falling for twenty years. Europe's crime rate is surging, liberal policies, and uncontrolled immigration. See how safe the streets of Oslo are when the Muslims are running them.

  • Advocatus

    It's highly commendable that Norwegian elites are into restorative justice. Perhaps they could try to restore Breivik's victims to life, too.

  • amused

    All I can say is UNBELIEVABLE ! Truly STUPIFYING ! Just think , he can theoretically go out and do it again , and actually get out of prison again to spend his old age as a free man !

  • Hank Rearden

    No Internet access??!!

  • Ghostwriter

    It's a shame Brevik's still going to be breathing. This guy's a poster child for the death penalty. After killing seventy-seven people,he deserves to be swinging from a rope,not writing books.

  • BS77

    In Norway there is no term in their language for "hard time".

  • WilliamJamesWard

    Curiously he smirks and laments he did not kill more people. No matter what his temporal
    circumstances are, in the end he seems to be set up for outer darkness and eternal misery,
    he will face judgement that deals with the unrepentant, the real luxury he has is time to change
    and beg forgiveness, not likely but it is there………………..William

  • David Ashley

    How come "restorative justice" doesn't include, say, work on a chain gang or military style boot camps – like those few prisons in the US with a (relatively) low recidivism rate?