Can Obama Control the Weather?

It’s always irritating when a candidate flip-flops on important issues, like whether he supports a health care mandate and a united Jerusalem or whether he has the ability to control the weather.

“We will be able to look back and tell our children … this was the moment when the rise of the oceans began to slow and our planet began to heal,” Obama proclaimed in 2008.

At his 2012 convention speech, the new Weathergod of the United States declared, “More droughts and floods and wildfires are not a joke. They’re a threat to our children’s future. And in this election, you can do something about it.”

That certainly sounds like a promise to control the weather. But has Obama successfully controlled the weather these past four years? The answer would seem to be that he did not.

Not only was the 2010 Atlantic hurricane season the third most active Atlantic hurricane season but 2011 had record breaking tornadoes. 2012 was a bad year for tornadoes too suggesting that either Obama does not control the weather, or that Obama does control the weather and is angry with us or that Whoever controls the weather is angry with Obama.

Obama was forced to abandon his planned stadium speech for a safer indoor venue, forcing Nancy Pelosi to admit that Obama does not indeed control the weather. “It’s rain, what can we do?” Pelosi said at a breakfast sponsored by The Christian Science Monitor. “There are some decisions that are made from a different place and whether it rains or not is not in the president’s control.”

Whatever that different place may be, Pelosi is certain that it is supportive of abortion, but not so supportive of stadium speeches. But Obama’s assertion that only by voting for him can we stop droughts and floods, is a return to biblical posturing from a man, who despite his prodigious ears, is still only a man.

It is time for Obama to come clean with the American people about his inability to control the weather.

  • Western Spirit

    Of course he can control the weather. Otherwise with ears like his a strong wind would carry him away and he would never be seen or heard from again.

  • Mannard

    He can't control the weather but he can sure dump toxic aluminum particles on everyone. GeoEngineering, the $5 billion dollar secret industry.

  • Rifleman

    I always thought it was funny that the same people who thought winning the Cold War or intercepting an ICBM was impossible, still have the arrogance to believe they can control the climate.

  • crazycatkid

    "Prodigious ears" I love that description. But, Daniel, didn't he warn folks not to talk about his ears? Uh-oh! He may target you with a tsunami.

  • mirjam

    He flip flops with the wind.