Bloomberg Claims He Only Banned Soda to Protect his 30-Year-Old Daughters

Someone save these children before they have another Coke

This really takes helicopter parenting and nanny state syndrome to a whole new level.

The ban on sugary drinks over 16 ounces was supposed to go into effect on Tuesday, but New York Supreme Court Judge Milton Tingling said in today’s decision the law is ”fraught with arbitrary and capricious consequences.”

Tingling added that the elected City Council, not the mayor-appointed Board of Health, has the authority to make such a law.

But Bloomberg framed the issue as a moral obligation.

“I’m trying to do what’s right,” he said. “I’m trying to defend my children, and you, and do what’s right.”

Bloomberg’s two daughters, Georgina and Emma, are 30 and 34, respectively. Emma has been married since she was 26. If they can’t stop drinking soda on their own, perhaps their father should butt out, instead of holding an entire city’s restaurant industry hostage.

The nanny state runs on wildly misplaced paternalism and it has gotten so bad that the mayor of what used to be the greatest city in the world is actually getting up at a press conference and claiming that he’s trying to save his children from drinking soda. It’s even more embarrassing considering that his children are old enough to have children of their own.

But this misplaced paternalism doesn’t end with his own family, instead Bloomberg insists on treating an entire city of adults like children and all he has managed to do is get on everyone’s nerves one last time.


    PICTURE THIS: I'm walking down a New York street with a 24oz cup. Two cops, who are across the street, blow their whistles, stop traffic, and run across the street screaming, "Stop that man… Big Gulp! Stop that man with the Big Gulp!' New York residents, still jumpy, tackle me down. The cops, with one foot on my neck, and the other cop with his knee on my back, grab my arms to handcuff me. I scream in pain and squirm. "Hogtie him!" Three cops cars show up and they throw me into one of them.

    As the cops gather TESTIMONY FROM WITNESSES, as well as an investigator taking pictures of my Big Gulp, another detective, with gloves, empties a 16oz bottle of water into it. "BUST HIM CAPTAIN! OVER 16!" They come to me and say, "Sir you are arrested for unlawful possession of cup larger than 16 ounces." He reads me my Miranda Rights but I could barely hear him over several people on the same street screaming "Buy your COKE here. White crystal COKE here! Obama approved coke here!" Another screams, "CRACK here. Dime bags here!" "Meth here!" "Ounces of fresh Hawaiian CHOOM here. Obama gives it a ten!" "Legal scrips here. Pain-killers, UPPERS AND DOWNERS here!"

    A prostitute walks up to my window and says, "When you get out I'll give you package deal," and then screams, "Look, Mr. Policeman, there's another ILLEGAL SODA over there!" The cop say's, "Thanks Trixie honey. I owe you one. Over there boys! Get him!" Captain calls Mayor Bloomberg: "Mayor we just got another scumbag!" Trixie grabs the Captain's phone: "Hi Bloomy. Trixie here. We still on for Friday night? Your office or mine?" Mayor: "Mine of course honey and bring a couple of g's of blow and I'll take care of it. Can't wait."

    Moral of the story? The Mayor sure has his priorities straight!

    (I bought the drink at JFK. Paid a cab to take me to New York City and it cost what I pay for a month's mortgage payment in New Mexico. And, it was ICED TEA! I sue the Mayor and the city and win. I pay off my mortgage and the view of Central Park is great. Thanks Mayor!)

    • Toni_Pereira

      Maybe in future times, when we start value freedom again, we will erect a statue of some hero shot by the police while he holds a giant soda drink…

  • Keiko_Infidel

    He's shameless. The little man got schooled by a judge–rejected, denied, and scolded–and now claims he was just trying to save people. Yeah, we know. That's what all the Marxists say.

  • Toni_Pereira

    Are his daughters in kindergarten??

    • Daniel Greenfield


    • Mary Sue

      No but I think he's going senile…

      • BS77

        George Orwell would have loved this guy as a quasi fictional character….a Utopian without a clue.

        • Toni_Pereira

          Yep…a clueless Winston.

  • Rifleman

    I'm sure lots of New Yorkers locked up for the 'crime' of excercising their 2nd Amendment rights said the same thing.

  • tagalog

    Out of all this brouhaha about the size of soda drinks you can buy in NYC, I'm glad to see that the lefties are asking themselves "why do people NEED 32-oz. sodas?" It takes some of the heat off the AR-15.

    As Mayor Bloomberg insists he'll spend the bucks to appeal the court decision against his fiat, because "somebody has to do SOMETHING" about those damn soft drinks in an atmosphere of financial trouble, it's additionally heartening to see Mayor Bloomberg put the lie to the ongoing leftie conviction that the left has the corner on rationality.

  • Mary Sue

    Any time a nanny-stater does something, they justify it on the basis of "the children!"

  • Moishe Pupick

    Tu,. 03/12/13

    Alas, Nanny Bloomberg seems to be afflicted with CYS (Chronic Yentah Syndrome).

    • Mary Sue

      hehe good one. :D

  • tagalog

    I notice that, now that Mayor Bloomberg has been drawn up short by a judge who seems to have his eye on the Fifth Amendment and the Fourteenth Amendment as well as New York's prohibition on government action that is arbitrary and capricious, the focus of the size of soft drink servings has now shifted (Second Amendment fans and those who call them excessively focused take note) to the issue of whether soft drinks have any value at all (and therefore should be banned altogether).

    I see that today's Microsoft internet opening page contains a story about the uselessness of soft drinks, by none other than the "experts" on nutrition. Yessirree, that's what I want, nutritionists making my food selections for me. They used to think laetrile was an anti-cancer medication instead of a quack remedy.

  • John Stone

    Diets are remarkably ineffective even when the dieter is self motivated. The chance that the mayor can get people to weigh less with this sort of outside pressure is wildly unlikely to be successful. If he had more sense he would back off and try to push the nanny state in some more workable way.

  • figment newton

    "I’m trying to do what’s right,” he said. “I’m trying to defend my children, and you, and do what’s right.”

    I think you guys are misunderstanding him. He doesn't mean his literal children, he means all of us.

    He has obama complex, he thinks he's God.

  • Chaim, The Bronx

    "Whaddya want?"

    "A large Coke."

    "What size?"

    "Gimme a Bloomboig!"

    "You got it!"

  • Steve

    Why didn't Bloomsbury tell us earlier that he was doing this for his daughters? What about my daughters? Why didn't he ask them? Now Bloomsbury want s to stop us from listening to music on our earphones because he feels we listen too loud. What's next on his agenda?