DC’s JaParker Deoni Jones Birth Certificate Equality Amendment Act to Legalize Time Travel


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DC’s JaParker Deoni Jones Birth Certificate Equality Amendment Act seems to have solely been designed as a parody beginning with its name. Its goal is a virtual parody of the absurd premise of transgender rights.

But in Washington DC it’s hard to tell parody from absurdity.

The District of Columbia Committee on the Judiciary and Public Safety has approved a bill that would allow anatomical males and females who have letters signed by a health professional indicating that they have “undergone a gender transition” to legally change the sex listed on their birth certificate.

The JaParker Deoni Jones Birth Certificate Equality Amendment Act of 2013 would amend current law that requires people who seek to change the sex on their birth certificate to have documentation that they have undergone a surgical sex change and to publish a public notice of the impending change.

It’s nice of the DC Council to legalize time travel by insisting on going back in time to change the past. It’s a little out of their jurisdiction, but when your city is Detroit with politicians instead of cars, a little escape into unreality is understandable.

Jones, a transgender male, was stabbed to death on Feb. 2, 2012 while waiting for a bus. A homeless man, Gary Montgomery, was charged with first-degree murder in the case and is awaiting trail,

If a law gets passed every time someone is stabbed by a homeless man in the capital of Obama Nation then the homeless will have enough paper to build shelters out of.

  • DogmaelJones1

    “Jones, a transgender male, was stabbed to death on Feb. 2, 2012 while waiting for a bus. A homeless man, Gary Montgomery, was charged with first-degree murder in the case and is awaiting trail [sic]…”

    Are they sure it was a homeless “man”? Are the authorities absolutely certain that it wasn’t a time traveling transgender female (or whatever) from the year 2199 exacting revenge on Jones for something his/her descendents didn’t do in January 2012 that altered the course of history, and his time machine failed and he was apprehended? Yes, I’m making this up, but, as Greenfield notes, it’s hard to distinguish anymore between news and absurdity.

    • OfficialPro

      The homeless man was obviously transphobic! :P

  • objectivefactsmatter

    Individuals do not have any right to change their original birth certificates.

    I can see how thanks to Mr. 0, just as Clinton demonstrated why sex on the job is perfectly OK, leftists might think you can change any document you want. Facts don’t matter to them.

    Just let any of them try to live under governments they’re trying to build. Just see how tolerant any communist government would be about these issues. What a bunch of insane dupes.