Fox Takes Over Michelle Obama’s White House Garden


Not that Fox. An actual fox. But we should probably still accuse it of racism and working for the Koch Brothers to be on the safe side.

Squirrels frolic in the first lady’s vegetable garden, feasting on overgrown tomato vines. Bees are left to their own devices, their waxy cells dripping with uncollected honey. The birds have a field day with plants left to go to seed. And at dusk and dawn there comes the fox, treading gingerly through the long grass of the South Lawn.

“The wildlife that lives on the historic 18-acre campus—including a newly arrived fox now making a home at the White House—are having a field day,” Kohan reports. “Thanks to the shutdown, groundskeepers have given up on their efforts to catch the elusive creature, who showed up to live inside the White House gates more than two weeks ago. [The fox] has been spotted many times at dawn and dusk” according to the White House sources she says are “highly reliable and multiple.”

And anonymous of course. Because no one in the White House will go on the record about even a fox in the South Lawn. Still everyone is making the best of it.

Toure has already gone on MSNBC and compared the fox to the return of the Confederacy.

Chris Matthews has shaken his head and bemoaned a fox so racist that it doesn’t seem to understand the racial implications of invading the garden of Michelle Obama at a time when she’s under attack by FOX News.

Michael Moore is planning a documentary about the fox and the Koch Brothers blaming it for the destruction of the economy. So far he has three hours of footage of him screaming at a raccoon because none of his unpaid interns wanted to tell him he had the wrong species.

Alec Baldwin has called the fox a pig and Gabrielle Giffords has announced that she’s patching things up with the NRA in a bid to get the fox.

Members of the Congressional Black Caucus have complained that the fox shouted racial slurs at them while they were dropping by the White House.

  • Johnnnyboy

    Hey, nice! ;-)

  • Toni_Pereira

    Sadly Daniel, some people will actually believe that this is true:)

  • tanstaafl

    Obviously an undercover reporter for Fox News………….

    • Gee

      No – that was another Mossad spy. Didn’t you know we cornered the market on over 25 species for use as spies?

      • tanstaafl

        i thought it was just squirrels and sharks………

  • baluga man

    this red and white fox is probably running off the dark grey foxes and is a racist. but many animals will do that to protect family and home

  • DogmaelJones1

    It would far, far more interesting is a pair of raptors appeared on the White House lawn.

  • Biff Henderson

    Once the groundskeepers catch this usurper they should dye the hide black to rectify an inequity that is plaguing our land. The consequences of black on black crime will be blamed on the white groundskeepers tasked with addressing this wrong.

  • Chris Behme

    The fox on the lawn is ok.
    It’s the snake and moose living in the White House I can’t stand

    • objectivefactsmatter

      I like the fox.

  • 20pizzapies

    Nothing like a FIFTH GRADE EDITORIAL .

    • WhyBeSoMean

      And here’s the proof once again – Along with having no religion, leftists have NO sense of humor!

      • 20pizzapies

        you got the right mug to go along with your statement .

    • Demetrius Minneapolis

      Are you that dumb to think this was an editorial? Really? Why don’t you hold your breath until Moore comes out with that documentary.

      • 20pizzapies

        are you really this stupid ?

        • glpage

          I doubt DM is, but I really wonder about you.

          • 20pizzapies

            don’t wonder , you are as stupid as DM …..birds of a feather , you know the rest .

  • WhyBeSoMean

    LOL. Thanks for the laugh.

  • RCraigen

    Looks like it’s guarding the hen’s house to me.