Global Warming Inventor Warns that World Will End in 3 Days

Of course it’s worse than we thought. It’s always worse than we thought!

UPDATE: (2 Days to go. Hug your loved ones. Drive a gas guzzler. The end is almost here.)

Forget the Mayans, they were a bunch of chumps who wore their headgear inside out. It takes a scientist to nail down the real date when the world ends.

January 17, 2013.

James Hansen, the man who looked at Venus and decided that it was once just like Earth before the Venusians built too many smokestacks and ruined it all, gave a very timely warning back on January 17, 2009. (via American Digest)

Barack Obama has only four years to save the world. That is the stark assessment of Nasa scientist and leading climate expert Jim Hansen who last week warned only urgent action by the new president could halt the devastating climate change that now threatens Earth. Crucially, that action will have to be taken within Obama’s first administration, he added.

And sadly, while the EPA did courageously attempt to regulate water as a pollutant and killed a bunch of coal plants, shale oil took off and all the good work was undone.

Now in 3 days, we must look forward to the end of the world. Pack your bags. Bundle up your cats, dogs, penguins and cleaning robots into the SUV and drive north into the ice gloriously blasting pollution in your wake while tossing soda cans out the window because it no longer matters… the world is doomed.

And isn’t that liberating?

Is this the face of a crazy man? I don’t think so.

But like every false prophet, James Hansen, who reads the future of earth in Venus, has found a new date for doomsday. It’s the date when Canada unleashes the terrible fury of its tar sands.

In the spring of 2012, Hansen warned, “If Canada proceeds, and we do nothing, it will be game over for the climate.”

Game over indeed and we’re not just talking hockey season here. “If we were to fully exploit this new oil source,” James Hansen proclaimed, while waving a megaphone in the middle of an abandoned shopping mall. “Sea levels would rise and destroy coastal cities. Global temperatures would become intolerable. Twenty to 50 percent of the planet’s species would be driven to extinction.”

This is absolutely a real crisis and not some goofy wealth redistributive scheme. There’s only one way out. We have to…

“We should impose a gradually rising carbon fee, collected from fossil fuel companies, then distribute 100 percent of the collections to all Americans on a per-capita basis every month. The government would not get a penny. This market-based approach would stimulate innovation, jobs and economic growth, avoid enlarging government or having it pick winners or losers. Most Americans, except the heaviest energy users, would get more back than they paid in increased prices.”

And then we can stop obesity by adding a whopping tax to food… and then distribute that tax evenly per capita to all Americans so that it all evens out… except for those people who eat.

And we can get rid of for-profit doom criers by adding a tax to fake predictions of armageddon and distribute the fee per capita to every American who didn’t predict the end of the world.

This market-based approach would reward innovation, industry and pick the losers who keep predicting the end of the world without delivering.

Yes Al, we’re looking at you too.

“I’ll be back! You can’t lock me up. And when I break out, I really will block out the sun. You’ll see!”

  • Mary Sue

    James Hansen is a Paul Ehrlich with a science degree.

    • klem

      And Hansen makes way more than Ehrlich. Science pays well.

  • GideonCain

    I am old enough to remember when NASA employed minds like Werner Von Braun, Bob Truax, and Ernst Stuhlinger, and we sent men to the moon. Now NASA employs jugheads like this, its mission is muslim relations (remember that one?), and we can't even place a man in low earth orbit. So much for the American experiments in socialism and multiculturalism.

  • Marylou

    Stop it! I'm still recovering from the last end of the world brought to us by Harold Camping. Anyway, I thought Al Gore invented global warning. He must have been just a bit player. Typical politician, taking credit for everyone else's accomplishments.

    • Daniel Greenfield

      Al Gore invented the internet. Global Warming was invented by the first politician in the form of hot air.

      • paul

        So the economy is getting better. Why is it that I've seen more vacancies on office space in the city in the past 6 months. It is amazing. Now that the new payroll tax has gone into effect there is less disposable income for people to spend. They are reducing the sales tax income. Great job boys and girls f-ing everything up. Small business is getting killed.

      • Big Irish

        didnt a muslim invent the internet?…

        • Daniel Greenfield

          Yes Abu Pipe. It was powered by water and severed heads.

        • Mary Sue

          With Algore, you never know…

      • JacksonPearson

        Good grief, how did this guy escape from his padded-loony-bin-cell?

  • steve b

    well, at least obama, cuomo and bloomberg won't have time to confiscate the guns and steal the rest of our money. And Obummer won't get to be president for the second term.

  • Anonymous

    I hear that the global warmists (ipad spell corrector attempted to use the faux correction "war mists" — heh), are overjoyed with Chinese air pollution — the coal- fired Chinese power plants belch so many particles into the air that it negates global warming! Hooray for the Commies and air pollution! They've saving the planet! Ingeniously! It's Another UN Peace Prize in the making!

    • Mary Sue

      oh yeah, this is the whole "the same pollution that is causing global warming is also causing global cooling" phenomenon…

  • Mary Sue

    remember about 30 years ago Ted Danson said we had 10 years left to save the oceans?

    • Daniel Greenfield

      And we did. There are no more oceans. Anyone who claims otherwise is a Climate Denier.

      • Mary Sue

        oh yeah and all the carbon dioxide being dissolved into the oceans is acidifying it! Don't go into the water! XD

    • Chan

      …The Oceans are getting dead zones all over them; the currents are dieing etc lol. It has happened. (Is happening)

      • Daniel Greenfield

        Last week I strolled all the way to Ireland from Coney Island through one of those dead zones

      • Mary Sue

        and according to those guys, the carbon dioxide in the oceans is acidifying it so hard, we're going to need those funny skeleton hand warnings like they have on harsh cleaners on the beach!

  • WilliamJamesWard

    Hansen, what a 'Whopper', he speaks to stupid people and our schools have been turning
    out enough chumps for scientific insanity to donate thier lunch money to help save the
    Earth. I know people that believe in this fraud and they have no clue to just how the Earth
    is warmed and what the true consequences of polution are, maybe Hansen got to much
    DDT in his diet as a kid……..and to think mosquitos may now take over the World………William

    • Kyle

      OK, genius. Tell me "how the Earth is warmed". Then I'll show you exactly how willfully ignorant you are.

      • WilliamJamesWard

        No Kyle I have no time for idiots………………..William

        • Kyle

          Thank you, William. You clearly know that I can support my views and that you cannot. Your concession is noted.

  • Vern

    All this global warming/climate change agitprop is really a veil…espoused by anti-capitalist, Commie wannbes bent on destroying the free market system. Meantime, while they are doing it, they want to tax you for having the wrong kind of house and/or car..

    • Kyle

      Listen to yourself, Vern! Your comment is nothing but a classic conspiracy theorist rant. What a loon.

  • Ar'nun

    "We should impose a gradually rising carbon fee, collected from fossil fuel companies"

    I know this sounds crazy, but scientific experiments have shown that the invisible gremlins that are currently nibbling away at the Ozone Layer reproduce by mating with Carbon Emissions from SUV's are frightened by high taxes. It is imperative to raise everyone's taxes to scare the Gremlins away…

    • Daniel Greenfield

      Especially the rich Gremlins

  • Kyle

    The volume and tone of the comments are on par with the quality of this article. The article is 100% word games and childish sneering, targeted to the most rabid science deniers (conspiracy theorists), and for the purposes of pumping up their ego (gee, I'm smarter than a million PHD's!) and innoculating them against the truth.

    The comments are 100% equivalent to the article. You dupes have responded just as you were supposed to respond. The entire denier game is to keep people so emotionally invested in the lies that confirmation bias and ego prevent them from ever accepting or acknowledging the truth.

    The one thing utterly lacking from the article and the comments is valid science. Here's a nice description of how the article's central thesis is a bald-faced lie of insane proportions. By all means follow the many links. Are any of you intellectually honest enough to properly assess evidence? Go to Slate blogs and read the 1/14/13 article, "Debunking the Denial: “16 Years of No Global Warming”"

    Let the braindead lying and name calling begin.

    • WilliamJamesWard

      Moron!!!

      • Kyle

        Why, thank you again, William! With links galore with which to find and refute any errors, you chose to fling poo. Your concession now has a large exclamation point after it. Also, I think it reasonable to interpret the silence of the rest of your conspiracy theorist nutter friends as a communal concession.

        Of course, every last one of you will reject that conclusion, but most likely, not a single one of you will attempt to address the science. Well, you might, but with nothing other than thoroughly dishonest anti-science that the professional deniers working for the anti-science lobby knew that confirmation bias would cause you to accept uncritically.

        Critical thinking, dudes. You might consider looking it up.

        • klem

          And you're ugly too.

          • Kyle

            Thanks. Yet one more concession that the deniers have no valid arguments.

      • Kyle

        Why, thank you again, William! With links galore with which to find and refute any errors, you chose to fling poo. Your concession now has a large exclamation point after it. Also, I think it reasonable to interpret the silence of the rest of your conspiracy theorist nutter friends as a communal concession.

        Of course, every last one of you will reject that conclusion, but most likely, not a single one of you will attempt to address the science. Well, you might, but with nothing other than thoroughly dishonest anti-science that the professional deniers working for the anti-science lobby knew that confirmation bias would cause you to accept uncritically.

        Critical thinking, dudes. You might consider looking it up.

  • Larrylake

    Same old story of fear…….if you have been around long enough you would remember all of the other hoax's perpetrated to bring in grant money. James Hansen is a kook.

    • Kyle

      Larry, I’ve been around long enough to remember all the times that the denialist method has been employed, often using the same people and organizations – smoking isn’t harmful, CFC’s don’t hurt the ozone layer, power plant emissions don’t cause acid rain, etc. Now they’ve crawled into bed with the slimiest liars of all – creationists – and have partially succeeded in making climate science conspiracism a part of religious dogma.

      BTW, all of these hoaxes were perpetrated by industrial special interests and they don’t even hide it anymore. They just count on the right wing media and confirmation bias to prevent you from seeing an obvious con job while being cocksure of a ridiculously improbable conspiracy involving all of science. Do you think 9-11 was an inside job, too?

    • Kyle

      And don’t forget, Larry, you’ve presented no science. What a shocker.

  • Kyle

    Well, loons, it looks like none of you are ever going to actually present a scientific argument – what a shock. All you've done is down-vote my comments because they illustrate how ridiculous and unsupportable your positions are. Have fun being wingnuts. Do us rational people a favor though and shut up, stop voting, and otherwise infecting society with your contagious ignorance. The entire planet would be extremely grateful.

    • klem

      "Do us rational people a favor though and shut up, stop voting, and otherwise infecting society with your contagious ignorance."

      Another classic response from a lefty green, if you don't agree you shall be silenced.

      Achmed the Dead Terrorist once said "Silence! I keeel you!!!"

      • Kyle

        Yep. Just as I said – no arguments. Just so you know how completely wrong you are:
        I’m a lifelong conservative.
        I did not try to force you to be silent. I simply pointed out the obvious thing that you nonetheless failed to grasp – if you have no valid arguments, you’re better off saying nothing than continuing to yammer on without one.

  • Kyle

    So, denier loons – no rational arguments, then? Can we assume that you are through with denying? That would be the intellectually honest response.

    • coolerator

      So what is it exactly about the article that you find wrong? It’s not like you’re substantiating your points with great arguments in this discussion. References to “links galore” aside, what proof have you provided?

      Did Hansen not predict that the world would end within 4 years if no action is taken? (http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/2009/jan/18/jim-hansen-obama)
      And yes, there’s enough ignorant people on both sides of the debate. But this whole game is so tiring. Science is not something you believe in, it’s theories substantiated by facts and developed into models that predict certain conditions in the future with a reasonable degree of accuracy. So far we haven’t seen any reasonably accurate models based on the theories that you vouch for.

      Going back to your arguments – certain things can be taken at face value at this point: smoking is bad for you. Ok. But not to the point that you should stop breathing completely in the smoke-filled room.

      So with the products of human activity. No doubt some of the products are bad. Sure. And cleaner cars are good. The problem is the price you’re willing to impose on everybody for cleaning things up.

      • Kyle

        You're simply wrong. The facts have been known with a ridiculously high level of certainty for many years. The effects are routinely proving to be at the high end of predictions. We can't afford the price of not taking action.

  • Nic

    oh my gosh you have to be kidding me im only 9 and i know the world wont end i heard alot about it ending in 2012 but i knew they were all wrong you know im not stupid and you shouldve figured out by now you'll never know when the world will end but god the father so all you guys need to be quiet and quit predicting the end of the world because you know it wont end its pretty obvious by now

  • HADAYDAY

    yet we are still alive.

  • fobamaaa

    you democrats have to be proud of this loon