Is Your Trash Can Bisexual?

We’re only asking you this because it’s vital that we get a representational cross-section of all the gender and sexual orientations of all the cans of trash in your area.

Residents filling in a survey on household waste were stunned that, after being asked about recycling reward schemes, the sizes of bins and whether their property has space to store them, the questionnaire inquired if they were heterosexual, gay or bisexual.

But the council says that this is simply one of the standard monitoring questions to ensure that the responses represent a cross-section of the city’s population and that people do not have to answer it.

With the council having already committed to provide wheelie bins for the vast majority of households, the questions are taking views on the type of wheelie bin scheme – leaving some residents angry that they were not even asked if they wanted them in the first place.

Mr Dave Dixon said: “It does not ask if residents want such bins but is very interested in their sexual orientation. Are we going to have different coloured bins dependent on ones orientation?”

Ah, but this is the left’s idea of representation. Representation no longer involves hearing out your views and then representing them, it involves collecting a whole bunch of persecuted groups and making sure that they are represented, though only to the issues that relate to their minority status.

Thus a bisexual resident is not entitled to refuse the trash cans, but he can demand that the trash cans align with his historically persecuted status by containing stickers featuring important events in bisexual history.

Another called Cyril added: “What the hell has sexual orientation or religion got to do with wheelie bins? Mind your own business.”

In the nanny state, the nanny is in your bedroom. You have no private business. All that you are belongs to the state.

  • Cat K

    In a related topic: My national professional organization's yearly questionnaire asks me if I am male, female, or transgender. I have not responded to this questionnaire in several years because of this question.
    If someone changes their "gender," then it is a process not a status. Or if it is a status defined by a trans-formation, shouldn't the person have to know where in the transformation they are at the moment?
    I know I am being way too rationale. It makes as much sense as tracking the sexual orientation of garbage.


      Base the question on a person's DNA.

      Not on some butcher plastic surgeons idea of what a male/female should look like.

      A woman with collagen Trout Lips is not a Fish.

  • Spikey1

    My Trashcan:

    Dressed in the most modest of colors, gray and black, slightly mobile with two lower appendages and a sturdy arm for dragging it along. It never really complains that much; even when it is raped by the large rodents that infest the world, only leaving a trail of worn out dreams scattered upon the ground. Full of junk, I have to take it for a walk once a week, so it can watch the cars and people pass by from the side of the road. I believe it has a hard time enjoying the sites while peering through the lid that is it's veil.

    You see, my trash can is not gay, it must be a muslim female….

    • Mary Sue

      haha good one

  • AdinaK

    There are times, when the only thing left to say is, you can't make this sh-t up!

    BTW, most women, at least those I know, prefer their "trashcans" mucho macho!

    Adina Kutnicki, Israel

  • slider 96

    In addition to being a ridiculous story Daniel , it is poor journalism . What State ? What City ? Which municipal Council ? Who's idea was it ? You WRONGFULLY broadbrush the left in a sweeping generalization …..that it is a strawman if there ever was one .
    How do you know that Daniel ? City Council Members do stupid things ,across the board and in all manner of hijinks ,like those in that Ca. Town that allotted themselves astronomical salaries .
    You're better than this Daniel .

    • Daniel Greenfield

      It's a quote of a news story. To learn the answers all you have to do is follow the link.

    • Edward Cline

      Slider: Daniel has answered, of course, but all you need to do is click on the highlighted portions of his columns, with are always links to his sources. He expects you to have some curiosity. These questionaires were issued in Birmingham, England, not Alabama. Further, how does one report an absurdity such as what he reports and stay within the bounds of straightlaced journalism? It's very difficult. Try it some time.

      • slider 96

        I would like someone to explain the relevance of the story , and how the conclusion was reached .

      • slider 96

        Edward, curiosity about something like this , not to mention in England, is tantamount to a kid with a stick unable to resist the temptation of sticking it in a piece of dogshiit on the street .


    A garbage can painted in "gay" rainbow pattern must be a comment on the gay lifestyle.