Shutdown: Obama Has to Make Do With Only 1/4 of His 1,701 Person Staff

"I'm sorry. I'm going to have to let 1,200 of you go."

“I’m sorry. I’m going to have to let 1,200 of you go.”

The horrors of the Government Shutdown were brought to life when we learned that Michelle Obama would be forced to limit her tweeting due to the effect of the shutdown on her 16 assistants.

But it gets bigger than that. Much bigger.

A US government shutdown would mean President Barack Obama had fewer people to cook meals, do the laundry, clean the floors or change the light bulbs, according to a White House contingency plan.

How many people does it take to change Obama’s light bulb?

About three-quarters of president’s 1,701-person staff would be sent home.

That’s still 436 people. Louis XIV probably had a smaller staff. And he needed someone to dress him. Is there an Executive Deputy White House Director in charge of dressing and wigging Obama?

Probably.

White House decisions on the environment and drug policy might get postponed.

Not White House decisions on the environment. Anything but that…

The executive office of the president would designate about 436 employees as “excepted”, or exempt from being laid off, to perform their jobs. The remaining 1,265 employees would be sent home.

Can’t they be sent home permanently?

The president and Vice-President Joe Biden are exempt from such a furlough.

If only. If only…

Biden, who has a staff of 24, would have to make do with 12.

Do we really need 24 people to service a completely useless man who has no reason to even get up in the morning unless an eagle drops a tortoise on Obama’s head?

Of the 90 people who maintain the president’s family living quarters, only 15 would remain to provide “minimum maintenance and support

Does it actually take 90 people to sweep the crumbs out of Obama’s bed and vacuum his bong? What if he only had to make do with only 15 servants?

Why he would be just like the rest of us ordinary people who only have a dozen servants to clean out our bedchambers, cook our meals and brush our teeth for us.

  • Jason

    And I thought Australia had a bloated public service…

    • Hass

      Easy up on Aus there mate:)

      Actually, our last useless Government was worse, when you take into account the size of our population.

      • Jason

        It’s hard to compare the two countries, but all I know is that the Rudd-Gillard-Rudd government was the worst government since federation. A bloated public service was the least concerning thing about them.

        It’d be nice if frontpagemag did some international coverage. Are there any good Australian equivalents you know of?

  • DogmaelJones1

    What? No more special flights on an Osprey for Bo, the Oval Office mutt, to Martha’s Vineyard? Not for a while. And never say that Obama isn’t a “man of the people.” He likes people, lots of them, to clean up after him and to see to it that his wife’s trap is shut as she scarfs down only the best, the very best, cuisine that taxpayers’ money can buy. He likes people. To look after him. He probably has a staff of 30 wonks to maintain his warehouse full of teleprompters.

    • vulgar_imposter

      Another sad little man who sits in his cramped double-wide mobile home and does nothing but fume, fret, and clean his guns. His wife left him years ago, as did the kids. They couldn’t take the anger, the hostility, the paranoia. They wanted their dad back. But he was gone. He was gone in a fit of rage over the scary black president who got elected twice despite the worst designs of Rush Limbaugh, Fox News, and millions of knuckle-dragging, grunting buffoons.

      • ImNoDhimmi

        The worn out race card the only thing you and your fellow leftist koolaid swillers have left. We don’t give a damn if Barry is black, white, red, yellow or pink with purple polka dots. It’s his policies, his arrogance, his ignorance, his narcissism, his total lack of competence, his disdain for America and her people, his complete disregard for anyone but himself that make us legitimately angry.

        • vulgar_imposter

          That’s a mouthful, Rush. You’re pretty worked up, aren’t you? Better chill before you blow a gasket. I’ll bet you’re home right now, sharpening knives, stringing barbed wire, and slamming ammunition into your Bushmaster. Gettin’ yourself ready for a confrontation with the government that will never happen because you lack the guts and the will. You’re a sad, pathetic creature, ImNoDhimmi. And, yeah, this is all about race. You hate black people. And that’s why you and other grunting Republicans have gone out of their way to destroy his presidency. But, guess what? He’s been elected TWICE. He got a health care bill through Congress (and the Supreme Court confirmed it — pretty constitutional, if you ask me). His legacy is secure. But what about your legacy? What have you done to make the world a better place? All you seem to do is complain and whine like a little girl.

          • Sharps Rifle

            Hey, moron, slavery was deemed “constitutional,” too (Dred Scott)…or had you forgotten that? Just because some schmuck in a black robe calls something “constitutional” doesn’t make it either so or right.

  • Softly Bob

    How will Obama survive with only 436 people to tell him how fantastic, handsome and clever he his? I suspect that his ego will start to collapse from malnutrition.

    • vulgar_imposter

      You do realize that your hero George W. Bush had just as many staff members, right? You conservatives are some of the most ill-informed, mean-spirited people in recent memory. Start acting like Americans and stop worrying so much about the scary black president. He got elected twice. Get over it.

      • chan chan

        Government is far too big, whether it’s Bush or Barry. And he’s not black. He’s half black, half white. Did you not know that? His mother was white, father black. Now, I make that 50/50.

  • Hass

    Oh the humanity!!….

  • Silver Gonzales

    Not to mention at least one Executive in charge of perfuming the private parts of Das Obama. Or maybe that is part of the duties of the VP.

    • Biff Henderson

      You know he’s not letting go of the guy that bleaches his bung hole.