72% of Adulterers Blame Actions on Global Warming


It’s a 96% consensus of 72% of adulterers who blame Global Warming. If you were wondering whether there is anything in the world that can’t be blamed on Global Warming, the answer is no there isn’t.

Global Warming is the deity of a secular left that is forever angry at the world and responsible for everything. If there’s a flood or forest fires, if it’s hot or it’s cold, if crime is rising or falling, if there’s a civil war in Syria or adultery in Berkeley...

…it’s all Global Warming’s fault.

Victoria Milan, a dating website for people looking to cheat on their significant other, surveyed 5,000 of its members, both men and women. A shocking 72% of them responded that yes, their own Al Gore-esque stress about unpredictable weather is the cause of their extra-marital dalliances. Guess the fact of their existing committed relationships was just an inconvenient truth.

A few centuries ago they would have said the devil made them do it. Now it’s the Global Warming devil that made them do it.

  • DogmaelJones1

    Edward Lorenz’s “Butterfly Effect” theory is in full throttle with the Doomsaying Global Warmists or Climate Changers or whatever they want to call themselves anymore. The theory is that a butterfly flitting hither and yon in your backyard in Poughkeepsie can cause a hurricane in Indonesia. Anyone doing anything will cause catastrophic weather changes. I rose this morning and fixed a pot of coffee. The heat so generated precipitated a chain of events. That caused the Chinese moon lander to fail, to snow in Death Valley, and a tidal wave to wipe out Los Angeles, This is “chaos theory” and the Warmists and Changers just love it.

    • Daniel Greenfield

      and yet when the carbon gods are appeased, then Warmists can safely fly in jets to Earth Day concerts

    • tagalog

      Just imagine if EVERY butterfly fluttered its wings at the same time – there’d be a worldwide windstorm that would flatten everything. Bet on it.

  • Tim N

    I blamed it on Obama.

    • Gee

      He is blaming Bush for it

  • truebearing

    Well, if Global Warming can turn a bombastic fool and demagogue into a “crazed sex poodle” there’s no telling what it could do. So far the only symptom I’ve experience is the pleasant sensation of the sun on my skin and an overwhelming thankfulness that the miserable winter is over.
    I did sweat a little as I dug up some winter burned bushes though, and was huffing and puffing Co2 all over the property. Maybe that is why that bird pooped on my arm. Gaia’s Revenge!

  • tagalog

    I’m debating with myself whether or not the climate change excuse is better than the sex-addiction excuse. I still favor the sex-addiction excuse because it’s funnier.

    I’m surprised that someone hasn’t blamed it on Bush.

  • bob e

    i blame climate change for not gettin’ any ..