Who’s Ready for a 3rd Hillary Clinton Book?

Image: Clinton Signs Copies of Hard Choices in Virginia

Hillary Clinton’s second book bombed. Readers didn’t find it a hard choice not to buy this ghostwritten tome. So, if you believe Edward Klein, Hillary wants to write a new book.

Klein, whose Blood Feud knocked Hillary’s Hard Choices off the top of the New York Times bestseller list, may just really be trolling her at this point. Or he’s auditioning for the job. But he really writes Bill better than he writes Hillary.

According to one of Bill’s closest advisers, the former president has been furious over the clumsy rollout of Hard Choices. He didn’t much care for the book in the first place and barely skimmed over it. But he had no idea that it was going to be such an embarrassment and a sales failure.

“Bill blames himself for not getting involved in the way the book was put together by a committee and how it was publicized,” this source said.

Over the Fourth of July weekend, Bill called Hillary, who was in London doing interviews with the BBC and [the left-wing British newspaper] The Guardian, and tried to buck up her spirits.

“He told her that he had a solution to their problem,” this source continued. “He said that the Clinton brand, as he likes to call it, had been smudged by the rollout of her memoir, but that the problem was fixable. He said that Hillary needed to sit down and write an entirely new book — a campaign book in her own hand and in her own voice. She should bare her soul. If the book is really honest, it will be a game changer and she will be seen as the comeback kid.

Assuming this is true, how many memoirs does anyone need? Obama got away with two and he was on the obscure side when the first one came out.

Hillary can’t write about her childhood in Indonesia, well she can but that might be a lie too far even for her. So it’s going to be yet another memoir talking about the same stuff that the previous two memoirs talked about? What’s the target demographic for this? David Brock?

If you’re a novelist and your second book bombs, as they often do, you can be a comeback kid by writing a third one. If you’re a politician, you ought to really stop at the first memoir.

One memoir is enough for most war heroes and presidents. Hillary is a former senator and Secretary of State with the hubris to put out two. Now that the second one bombed, it’s really time to stop. If she does put out a third book, it’s likely to be policy based. Gore owns the environment. But Hillary’s advisers will find an issue that they want her to own. Maybe health care again. Or families.

But it would take a complete egomaniac to try for a third memoir.  Unfortunately the Clintons are complete egomaniacs.

  • Habbgun

    The memoir will be called “Ah is In No Ways Tired”.

    Thrill as Hilary describes her leadership in the defeat of the Confederacy and the end of slavery.

    Emerging from obscurity Hilary leads Union Forces in the West. Her great victories lead her to being named General of all Union Armies by her husband and President Bill Clinton. From the Battle in the Wilderness to the siege of St. Petersburg Hilary is the very model of the modern heroic feminist. In the end she leaves the White House penniless needing the sales of this modest tome to feed her family.

    Co-written with her good friend U.S. Grant.

    • mwmichaels

      Wait a minute! Wait just a darn minute. You forgot to mention the time she had to dodge that sniper fire. How could you? Shame.

  • http://libertyandculture.blogspot.com/ Jason P

    “She should bare her soul.” -Bill

    She has one?

    • tagalog

      Are you sure Bill didn’t say “bare her sole?”

  • Gee

    If the Arabs used toilet paper they would certainly buy up her book for a third memoir

  • DogmaelJones1

    “She should bare her soul….” If she dares to. Sure, she has a soul. But the question is: Is it worth contemplating? Doubtless, not. And it is probably so repulsive that she wouldn’t be doing herself any favors by baring it.

    • http://libertyandculture.blogspot.com/ Jason P

      She might as well title her next book “The Biography of Dorian Grey.”

    • knowshistory

      given a chance to chose between gazing at Hillary’s soul and and a mirror-free look at medusa, I would take a chance on being only changed to stone.

      • DogmaelJones1

        Instead of chancing being turned to stone by Medusa, flip that mirror around and let her see her reflection. Then she’ll turn to stone, and then we can break it up and use the gravel to repave a road.

  • glpage

    “She should bare her soil…” Sorry Bill, it isn’t going to work, Hillary has less capacity for the truth than you do.

  • USARetired

    I sincerely hope she wastes all her ‘ill gotten’ money on Books that wont sell!

  • http://banliberals.com/ Ban Liberals

    When did the female piggy take up comedy?

  • Bryan Schmick

    IF she ‘writes’ a third book, it will be on the glory of womanhood to boost her political chances of breaking that glass ceiling (when will we get our first Mongolian Nazi tattoo wearing biker president?). She would probably devote a chapter to the wonderfulness of being a grandmother (ignoring the abortion issue) and bring grandpa bill in to use his name even more.

  • Borax

    Hopefully, this one will allow us to color in it. The last two books were schidt.

  • mwmichaels

    Actually, I can see it. The entire volume can be dedicated to the campaign stop (I dunno what kind of stop it was or where she was but not worth my time to look it up – campaign works as well as anything else here) where she had to dodge sniper fire. It will be as believable as any other of the tripe she puts out.

  • tagalog

    Not “Tired,” instead “Tahrd.” “Tired” is too white-bread.