Foment Hysteria With This One Weird Trick

the-end-is-nearWhy do so many right-of-center websites run ads for shady-sounding consumer products and services that portend gloom and doom?

When surfing the Internet conservatives can’t avoid sales pitches for miracle cures, magic elixirs, life problem fixers, floating in a sea of Buzzfeed-style listicles and other junk food for the mind. The intellect-bypassing memes are everywhere. Every day we’re told how “this one weird trick” can solve our problems. Many on the Right are enabling this kookiness, joining in with those on the Left for whom conspiracy theories are mother’s milk.

Conservatives shouldn’t be feeding into this trend. All these wacky, wide-eyed ads discredit the conservative sites and media outlets that carry them, possibly leading readers to take the valuable news reported there with a grain of salt.

And in recent years apocalyptic ads, often accompanied by scary videos, are being featured far and wide on conservative sites. The pitches go well beyond the usual breathless warnings about water fluoridation, vaccination, and mysterious chem trails in the sky that appeal to, well, everyone who is conspiracy-minded among conservatives, liberals, and moderates.

The U.S. dollar, we’re told, is months away from collapse. When the currency goes south, 200 million or more Americans will be wiped out financially. One advertiser claims to know exactly when the greenback will take a dive.

Exactly? While it is true that the Federal Reserve’s relentless, reckless expansion of the money supply can only end in tears eventually, predicting exactly when the dollar might collapse is next to impossible, except perhaps when the collapse is imminent. There are far too many economic and political variables to hazard a guess.

But wait; there’s more.

The World Wide Web will soon go “dark,” it is claimed. A new market will somehow kill the Internet, paving the way for a new $14 trillion –with a ‘T’– industry. You can make gazillions if you get in now with this mystery investment!

FEMA is hoarding “survival food” whose longevity would make Clark Griswold proud. This food, if that’s what it is, has a 25-year shelf life, and is supposedly flying off the shelves awaiting the moment when our friends and neighbors, who didn’t take the time to prepare for the coming disaster, are forced into FEMA camps. Food stamps and dependency on government are leading to “‘communist’ food brainwashing,” something that those of us who study the Left need to learn about.

When your famished neighbors come to take away your food and water, your life will depend on knowing the right way to defend yourself physically, it is claimed:

Mainstream home defense strategies flat out don’t work and … relying on them paints a big bulls-eye on your home leaving you and your family vulnerable, defenseless and exposed against the savage scum that will rise with the coming crisis.

One video insinuates that a series of nightmare scenarios are about to descend on America. North Korea, whose low-rent missiles couldn’t hit a barn door at 50 paces, is planning an attack on the United States, the video seems to suggest.

The government is preparing massive grave sites in secret because it “knows exactly what’s coming. The government is prepared but they aren’t prepared for your survival. The government is preparing for your orderly death.”

It’s time to get a bomb shelter. Or a panic room. Or head for the hills or maybe the caves.

Where do all these feverish admonitions come from?

Americans have always had a fondness for conspiracy theories. This makes sense in a country where the motherland went out of its way to oppress the people of the Thirteen Colonies. There was a time in the mid- to late-1700s when it was perfectly rational to protest that the government really was out to get you.

After all, Americans had their rights as Englishmen taken away and this shocking deprivation has left psychic scars on the American people that continue well into the nation’s third century of independence. Cautious Americans developed institutions to ward off tyranny and preserve liberty and the rule of law.

Perhaps some conservatives nowadays may be excused for crossing the line between healthy skepticism and rabid paranoia. They didn’t create the dire situation that Americans now face as their country slips away from them a little more each and every day. Dealing with the crazy, confused mess that leftists have created isn’t easy.

President Obama has done everything he can to fertilize the fever swamps and foment discord, dividing Americans along the neo-Marxist lines of race, class, and sex. His Huey Long-like approach to governance is turning American society upside-down. His actions feed pessimism and depression, pushing desperate Americans to look for answers in unusual places.

Obama has unleashed the National Security Agency on all Americans. He has empowered the meanest, most hated federal agency there is, the Internal Revenue Service, to go after conservative activists and those who fail to abide by the constantly changing Affordable Care Act. He defrauded the voters in the last election by covering up his many misdeeds in office. He is destroying the military, industry, the economy, and civil society.

It has gotten to the point where if you’re not worried about the future, something is wrong with you. The conspiracy-minded ads and sales pitches popping up all over the Internet are symptoms of a society that is unraveling under the weight of decades of leftist error.

There is much to be concerned about, but it would be nice if websites on the Right refrained from fanning the flames of mass hysteria.

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  • DogmaelJones1

    I don’t think the rightist websites, such as this one, have a choice in the kinds of ads that are run. They’re just locked in. See the ten ads that precede this comment, for example. I mean, if you don’t speak Patagonian, watch this video now. and get your face stretched by two dozen hands. Warren Buffet signals the collapse of a mile-high mound of ice cream. Six warning signs that you’re alive. The best babes’ buns around (that was interesting, at least). And so on. Here’s one weird trick, readers: Ignore the ads, read the article content. Never mind those unsold cruise line penthouses.

    • DowntotheBone

      Well said!

    • CaoMoo

      Oh god what are the six warning signs you’re alive I’m worried I might be!

      I agree I always assume online that ads are just ads and that they are not necessarily chosen by the site. Otherwise I’d be ticked that Pandora thinks I want to hook up with gay singles in my area. The internet thinks I’m gay I’m suing my I.P. for Defamation of character! Judge the site by it’s service not the ads :)

  • truebearing

    The fear people feel is legitimate. Incomes are dropping while costs are rising. Health care has turned into a nightmare that is about to get worse. The NSA is spying on us, the IRS is persecuting us, and the Russians are laughing at us…along with the rest of the world. Many have lost their jobs and their homes. Many have lost their businesses. We have a racist Marxist/Muslim for a president, and he is undermining the nation in every way possible. And, as usual, the Left is in a perpetual conspiracy to gain totalitarian control. Yes, the is The Golden Age of Paranoia. If you’re not a little paranoid these days, there may be something wrong with you.

    Naturally, there are opportunists who want to profit on people’s fears. The problem is that reality is competing with fiction when it comes to the scary possibilities, so some of this stuff fools people. But before we all buy a bug-out bag and try to escape to Belize, let’s consider uniting with the others who want this nation back and stand with them and fight for all we’re worth.

    • Matthew Vadum

      Fair enough.

      • swemson

        A big part of it is simply crass commercialism albeit on a small scale… Prior to the globalists taking an interest in the global warming scam, climate hysteria, which has always been with us, was driven by the media, for the simple reason that catastrophes sold newspapers…

        Not being able to participate in the riches of mass merchandising available to the left through the major media, the right, with the exception of Fox News, has to settle for the crumbs left lying on the sidewalks of Madison Avenue, peddling things such as books about religious prophecies and dehydrated food supplies for survivalists. Based on the constant barrage of their cheesy eMail teasers, one could get the impression that some conservative websites, like WND, are in reality only front operations for a discount Christian bookstore. Sometimes they get so repetitive, that I get nostalgic for the good old days of advertisements for male enhancement pills.

        Still, as Henry Kissinger said:

        “Even a paranoid can have enemies”

        And as conservatives / libertarians, we have no shortage of real ones…


  • guest

    Isn’t it really just ‘professional’ subjectivism? We don’t have a Thomas Paine or an Ethan Allen. So the goal of all this is to blur everything, so it all comes down to emotion in the end choice. How do you appeal to the people of planet Idiocracy? Instead, we have the unity guy, the religious this guy, the religious that guy, and don’t forget the religious other guy. The conservatives would improve by factors of ten if they just read and republished everything from the 1790’s.

  • 1keith1

    Did we forget about the numerical code to wealth that is supposedly contained in the Bible? This stuff is on conservative radio, too. Why do I not hear it anywhere else?

  • Andy_Lewis

    He said “listicles”, heh heh, heh heh.

  • AKEK

    You wouldn’t be talking about, among others, a prominent publication that rhymes with “Rational Preview,” would you? I am really surprised at the low-rent spam that they foist on their readers. It appears that the choice with them might be (a) swallow the garbage or (b) unsubscribe altogether. Just not getting the advertising doesn’t seem to be an option on their Manage Subscriptions page. I’ve tilted over to the middle of the fence recently, with a lean toward the unsubscribing option. Too bad they aren’t more careful about their advertisers–I really like most of their online writers.

  • WillSpencer

    And this article shows ads like these:

    “Weird Food Kills Blood Pressure”
    “‘Warren Buffett Indicator’ Signals Collapse in Stock Market”
    “Heart Attack: How Your Body Warns You Days Before”
    “Lose Weight, Get Ripped with Innovative Website”
    “What Happens When You Take a Testosterone Supplement”

  • BRL…

    QUOTE: Where do all these feverish admonitions come from?

    How come you never get around to answering or even addressing this question? This article belongs in WatchTower, where no question is ever answered.