"On this day, exactly 95 years ago, the Council of People's Commissars of the RSFSR was established All-Russian Extraordinary Commission for Combating Counter-Revolution and Sabotage."
Somewhere, deep underground, fireworks are being shot off in the faces of blindfolded prisoners. Somewhere muffled cheers are rising from behind iron bars. Somewhere a codes message of congratulations is passed through three routers, reflected off a mirror and sent deep into the frozen north from a government building in Washington D.C.
Yes boys and girls, it's the Day of the KGB Agent, a special day every year to celebrate the founding of the KGB, under its various names, currently known as the FSB, and today is a very special KGB anniversary because it's the 95th anniversary of the KGB.
For Putin, only the second KGB member to run the country, December 20th is an especially special day, and he marked it by holding a press conference blasting the United States.
"I am probably a bad Christian," Putin said, referring to the Magntisky Act, "but when the United States slaps us in the face, I must answer."
"Abu Ghraib is known to the whole world. In Guantanamo where they keep people for years without charging them and they walk in chains like in the Middle Ages. They carry out torture in the middle of the country. Can you imagine if we did that?"
"Today we celebrate not only the 95th anniversary of our control, but also a national holiday, a special day for those who have chosen a difficult way of serving the Fatherland ", said the head of FSB in the Nizhny Novgorod region, Valery Nazarov.
"On this day, exactly 95 years ago, the Council of People's Commissars of the RSFSR was established All-Russian Extraordinary Commission for Combating Counter-Revolution and Sabotage, recognized in the young Soviet Republic to provide internal and external security. Years passed by the changing international situation and polity of the country, but the defense of the state has always been in the forefront," said Alexander Kalashnikov, head of the FSB in the Komi Region.
Happy KGB day to one and all.