Global Warming Inventor Warns that World Will End in 3 Days

Now in 3 days, we must look forward to the end of the world. Pack your bags. Bundle up your cats, dogs, penguins and cleaning robots into the SUV and drive north into the ice gloriously blasting pollution in your wake while tossing soda cans out the window because it no longer matters... the world is doomed.

"I'll be back! You can't lock me up. And when I break out, I really will block out the sun. You'll see!"