According to Afghanistan, Libya, Somalia, the Saudis excel at human rights.
It's not a joke. It's the United Nations.
And it's that punchline to the joke that the UN protects human rights that is the UN Human Rights Council, which is always ready to condemn human rights abusers like Canada, Australia and America... but has a kind word for defenders of human rights like China, Libya and Saudi Arabia.
Today's United Nations punchline has been brought to you by billions of your tax dollars. It's your money. You deserve a good laugh.
As the UN Human Rights Council scrutinized Saudi Arabia's domestic rights record this morning... out of 95 countries who took the floor, 82 praised Saudi Arabia.
Hillel Neuer, executive director of the Geneva-based human rights group UN Watch, said the country is poised to win a seat on the Human Rights Council.
"A country whose legal system routinely lashes women rape victims rather than punish the perpetrators should not have been praised effusively by members of the UN's top human rights body," said Neuer. "Instead the world should have addressed the Saudi regime's use of cruel, inhuman and degrading punishments, such as flogging, amputations and eye-gouging."
But look at who lined up to praise Saudi human rights.
Afghanistan: "We commend Saudia Arabia as they continue to enhance the protection and promotion of human rights..."
Palestine: "We take notice of Saudi Arabia's efforts to protect and promote human rights..."
Somalia: "Saudi Arabia maintains a high priority for protection and promotion of human rights…"
Libya: "Saudi Arabia continues to strengthen human rights and promote them and this deserves our appreciation..."
Mauritania, VP of the UNHRC (and a country that practices slavery): "We commend Saudi Arabia for always seeking to strengthen human rights…We commend Saudi Arabia in terms of the progress on guaranteeing fundamental rights and freedoms, socioeconomic progress, participation of women at all levels and participation in society.
China: "We appreciate efforts made to protect the rights of children and to have dialogues of religious tolerance..."
Pakistan: Commended "laudable steps taken by Saudi Arabia to promote and protect the rights of children and women..."
According to China, Saudi Arabia which arrests Christians for praying, practices religious tolerance.
According to Afghanistan, Libya, Somalia, the terrorists running the Palestinian Authority, and a Muslim country that practices slavery, the Saudis excel at human rights.
And according to Pakistan, a country where raping women is practically in the Constitution, Saudi Arabia, which won't let women drive or leave the house, is also breaking new ground in protecting women's rights.
Every comedian knows when to go out on a high note. The joke that is the UN has reached its high note. There is nothing else. It's time to disband the whole thing, admit it was a long gag, and move on to the Glasgow Comedy Festival, and maybe use the UN building to house the homeless.
There's nothing else left to do.