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Is your home on fire because your local fire department is run by three lesbians named Kirsten and there’s no water because that department is also being run by a diversity hire?
Sorry, maybe you should have bought diversity insurance.
The vital infrastructure of yesterday’s cities used to be run by somebody’s brother-in-law while the vital infrastructure of today’s cities is being run by a professional grievance expert with the right combination of skin color, sex and sexual appetites and makes that brother-in-law, who at least managed to marry into the right family, look like a genius. That’s bad news for you.
Every town, city and state is just one crisis away from melting down like a Somali ice cream cone. Your power grid consists of solar panels, wind turbines and other technology that could barely power a medieval grain mill on the best of days roped together with batteries stolen by migrants from defunct Teslas, and a few actual leftover power plants paid for with carbon credits for a turbine in Montana. The power company has a climate plan, an equity plan and weekly DEI sessions, but it doesn’t have a plan for what to do when the power goes down.
Your government is run by a few kids who spent their college careers demanding safe spaces and complaining about insensitive Halloween costumes and older drunken politicos waiting to die in office who are scared to death of them. Instead of planning for an actual disaster, everyone spent the last year arguing about Gaza ceasefire resolutions and making plans for when the sea levels are projected to rise in the 2030s. No one has been inside their actual offices since the pandemic and the only work government officials have done was in pajamas.
The police have been defunded. The few remaining cops don’t answer calls because they don’t want to be featured on the evening news. The ERs closed because they were filled with migrants using them in lieu of health insurance. The doctors triage by asking for pronouns. And in the event of a major disaster, relief workers screen for Trump signs and offer handbooks about checking your cishet privilege.
How do you cope with all this? Diversity insurance.
Regular insurance covers natural disasters but diversity insurance protects you against the unnatural disaster behind the natural disasters. Natural disasters are unpredictable, but DEI disasters are extremely predictable so the one thing you know is that whenever a disaster happens, an army of DEI hires will make it that much worse. If a firestorm breaks out, the DEI hires will have misplaced all the water. If a hurricane strikes, DEI staffers will insist on handing out relief supplies based on the sexual preferences of the recipients. If the power goes out, DEI hires will make sure that it never comes on again because that would be bad for the environment. And if an asteroid is headed for the earth, the DEI hires will issue press releases warning that black people will be hardest hit by the total extinction of the human race.
Someday, top government, corporate and emergency positions will no longer be staffed by sociology majors who got into Harvard by writing about the time racist police officers randomly stopped them while they were going 95 miles an hour and smoking pot in a school zone, but until then, diversity insurance is your best defense against every important position being held by DEI morons.
Morons who hate you and view every job, no matter the title, position or mission statement, as an opportunity to deconstruct the parts of western civilization that don’t directly benefit them.
Until then, there’s diversity insurance.
Diversity insurance will insure you against DEI hires. When crime waves terrorize your neighborhood, everything is on fire, including the fire department, and the economy craters because the only economics training the people in charge of it have is saying “late stage capitalism, am I right” and rolling their eyes, diversity insurance will be there for you.
Diversity insurance can’t stop DEI, but it can heal some of the damage done by DEI.
You may think that you don’t need diversity insurance because you don’t live in New York, Los Angeles or Minneapolis, but DEI can strike when you least expect it. Even if you’re in the reddest town in a red state, and you wouldn’t vote for a woke in a million years, companies, including the ones responsible for your water, power and emergency services, are still hiring college graduates from top schools who only know that everything is racist. Especially you.
And even if your town hasn’t been infested yet, the state and federal level is full of them. So is your insurance company. And the private equity funds that control it. And the union retirement pensions that control the private equity funds. And the DEI hire politicians that control the union pensions that control the private equity funds that control your insurance companies.
Diversity insurance however doesn’t do DEI hires. Unfortunately diversity insurance also doesn’t exist. Insurance is supposed to protect you against possible disasters, not absolutely certain ones. And DEI is the most certain disaster since the Titanic decided to match wits with an iceberg. Insuring against diversity has worse risk rates than a house built on a mudslide in the middle of an earthquake that is sliding into the ocean just as a hurricane shows up.
It’s easier to insure an 18-year-old driving a Porsche in Chicago than against DEI.
There’s no such thing as ‘diversity insurance’. And there’s no way to escape diversity except by returning to a system based on merit and occasional nepotism which is still better than a system whose only concept of merit is a combo of toxic politics and correctly colored body parts.
You may not be interested in DEI, but DEI is interested in you and will destroy you. The only insurance against it is destroying it as thoroughly as a DEI hire can destroy your local fire department, police force or a sub sandwich. Either you destroy DEI or it will destroy you.
Bravo Daniel. Your wit is first rate.
Thank you, John for a first rate comment.
You and Robert Spencer are my favorites.
Bravo Mr. Greenfield; great article!
Here on the DEI topic from Spiked [GB]
They will disappear just like the dinosaurs, but not from a asteroid
Bu WHO will be round to dig up their bones and identify them? And will those bones end up being correctly assembled again?
Great article Daniel!It made me laugh and that’s not an easy thing to do. <3 ;))
We all need a little humor to stave off smoke inhalation
I live in Florida and I’m a constitutional conservative and I’ve always loved my country. Everyone who hates America should be kicked out and banned. They can live in Venezuela.
I love this website.
All the best to you.
If diversity is our strength why don’t African, Arabic and Asian countries want white people to move there?
Good point.
Tinhorn dictator (& Biden role-model), Mugabe hated white people so much that he had all the skilled white farmers run off or killed.
However, in his haste to purge evil, white, blood from Zimbabwe, he forgot to have his cronies who were taking over the farms learn how to farm.
A famine coupled with descending poverty followed.
The recently deceased Peanut Dhimmi Carter wanted a “Palestinian” state on the ruins of Israel and a Second Holocaust as his legacy but he had to content himself with giving away the Panama Canal, replacing the Shah with the Ayatollah Khomeini, Anastasio Somoza with Marxist Leninist pedophile Daniel Ortega and “democracy and majority rule” in Zimbabwe under Robert Mugabe
Exactly. single handedly he destroyed all farming in their country.
Zimbabwe’s loss, our gain.
I have some white former South African friends who ran to save their lives, one was telling me that when he was a boy he needed emergency treatment and whilst in the hospital the nurses were smiling at each other saying (in africans) that this is another white boy about to die.
A coloured orderly warned his mother and she took him to another hospital and he now lives in England.
Don’t kid yourself, it’s not just South African hospitals
True that. A tally of the monies rewarded US hospitals as bounty for COVID diagnoses and death from COVID certificates illustrate that.
California has learned much from him, letting land return to nature, as if food will take care of itself.
And it is not as if leftists here have not held up the Mugabe side of history as worthy alternative to the capitalist, free enterprise model.
The common bond between Islamists and the socialist-feminist-gender DEI activist coalition of the West, between communists and fascist, is cruelty.
I have come to believe that. The common factor in the coalition of the identity groups is the sadistic fantasies of hurting their “betters”.
Watch whereent all the arguments of the collective hives of this coalition point to. It is like watching their eyes, which is a highly evolved trait amongst humans.
They all want to hurt someone.
Even if they have to starve a third of the word to do so.
and the only ones surprised were the hungry ones.
’cause whitey will just gentrify da community and drive up prices. Look wha’ happened in Inglewood.
“African, Arabic and Asian?” I am going to have to check my “AAA” auto club card “to be sure, to be sure” (Valley speak).
The DOD is ‘tripling down’ on DEI policies blaming its disastrous effects on CONUS military bases on the existing non-DEI members for their ‘privilege’ mentality. That’s right, it’s not the incompetents’ fault, it’s always someone else.
The same old democrat mantra. Now having its effect on the DOD. They have mandated training on ‘Checking your privilege’ to all non-DEI staff.
The DOD even sent memorandums that there will be absolutely NO policy changes despite the change in administration when Trump is sworn in. This was not their tone when Biden took over.
…and they wonder why they are hemorrhaging all the brain-trust which not-coincidentally, are the conservative members.
Brilliant. Thanks Daniel !!!!!
How about “Rebuilding Insurance”?
I asked Google AI the following question:
“What might an “Enterprise Zone” the size of 50 square miles, located in the beautiful So Cal area of Malibu look like if it were to be rebuilt in the wake of the devastating fires without Gov’t leadership, only advice and support? And a team of 10 of the best entrepreneurial industry leaders vs gov’t bureaucrats and lawyers.”
The answer was not only awesome, but far too long and in-depth to post here. You’re welcome to cut and paste that question into your own AI tool.
And where does all this DEI funding come from?
Communist China. They are the biggest funders of ESG and DEI and nobody comes within 200 miles of matching them.
The CCP must be stopped.
There’s a photo going around that shows a PAINTED RAINBOW FIRE HYDRANT that doesn’t work with a Fire raging in the background.
My Caption: “If anyone dares to use this hydrant which then ruins the paint job, you are obviously homophobic and you will be reported to proper authorities. If you allow your dog to urinate on it, you will be charged with a Hate Crime!”
An incident in Albuquerque. The Kommie Mayor Keller paid $35,000 to paint two rainbow crosswalks. A few weeks later, a man on a motorcycle burned rubber on it, he was arrested AND WAS CHARGED AND CONVICTED OF A HATE CRIME! His wife, Elizabeth, studied in Cuba and Nicaragua and even followed Che’s Motorcycle journey in South America. She certainly had to prove that she wasn’t a spy or counterrevolutionary and was in a fact, A COMMUNIST! HOW THEN DID SHE PASS THE FBI BACKGROUND CHECK TO WORK AND SANDIA AND LOS ALAMOS NATIONAL LABS?????????????????????? She is also a supporter of HAMAS! “COMO?”
CALL FOR BASS, FIRE CHIEF, NEWSOM… TO RESIGN… NEVER… THEY DOUBLE DOWN! There are some that are already blaming Trump???
MEXICANS HELPING WHILE NEWSOM TURNED DOWN THE NYFD???
One good thing, this IS the Presidential nail in Newsom’s coffin!
An open COMMUNIST in our Congress? Supporter of the Castro’s? What National Security Secrets was she passing along to our enemies? But then again, Congress is filled with Communists who hide in the Democratic Party Closet!
The list of successful ” diverse” people from non white majority countries is a very short one. Oprah and LeBron didn’t make it in Rwanda, half white Obama was not elected in Kenya.
No, but they sure did let Oh Bammy back into Kenya with his cash for just long enough to stump and rig and bribe for his cousin Raila O Dingbat to get “elected” there….
This is brilliant stuff. Unfortunately, should such insurance ever actually become available, no doubt the geniuses who are shocked homeowners insurance companies in California no longer want to provide insurance will put a ceiling on rates and be shocked there is a severe shortage.
It won’t happen.
Insurance companies are essentially bookies betting against you losing.
If you losing is a sure thing, they won’t take the bet.
That’s why you can’t get fire insurance in a wildfire zone, or earthquake insurance when your house is built on top of a fault line.
That impeccable logic could easily result in no insurance company ever binding coverage or anyone living in certain parts” of frisco, Smog Angeles, or , Oakland,
If you are dumb/crazy enough to live in THAT zip code you’re crazy enough to carry your own risk.
Greenfield is always great! And he expanded my vocabulary with “cishet”—although I am grateful to live in the kind of cultural backwater where nobody else has seen or heard that expression either—and nobody apologizes for being cishet or non-BIPOC or non-LGBTQ+. I’ll be mum about where I live. Don’t need any refugees from the Wokelands flooding in!
Those are the best kinds of places
Daniel has a point here. I lived in Cape Coral for 10 years here in Florida, a very red state and when I moved and had the power shut off there by LCEC they sent me a letter to my new address saying they had opened an EQUITY account in my name, which appeared to have fake money in it that i could do nothing with, so I’m not sure what good it was, but as I said to them in email it appeared to be the bait on a Marxist hook I’d no wish to bite on, and let’s not communicate again as I have no use for communists, who open accounts in my name without my consent for purposes I certainly do not trust.
Be careful that they don’t forcibly sign you up for a government retirement plan and start harvesting your salary.
California started doing that.
Burn down a city to protect a Fish is Not Common Sense
It is for people who hate people because they love the planet so much
Those who were raised on junk like Captain Planet Network Earth One Child One Voice and all that Eco-Junk from Red Ted Turner
In California “human guilt” trumps “white guilt’.
unless, of course, you ARE a f
I thought that place “smelt” a little “off”….ish……
Your’re right. Those people are mentally disturbed.
Got me thinking about what diversity insurance would be like in practice. What good would it be in a society which is collapsing from DEI? The best use of the money would be to escape to somewhere else.
I think the crushing weight of DEI on our society is a pre-existing condition. Couldn’t get coverage–unless Obama could make it happen.
Excellent point
Professor Daniel, This article is grooming!
Tomorrow I expect to see DEI Insurance offered on Front Page.
Front Page DEI Insurance.
LoL
I probably gave someone some ideas. Wouldn’t be the first time.
I’d buy some, but only if the DEI insurance agent looked like me. It’s a comfort-level thing….
Now that’s funny!
You can’t call certain people “retards” any more……..they insist on being called “Democrats.”
Let’s compromise.
Demotards.
Roger that!!!!!!!!
tardocrats?
Now I have to think of more words to write because the bot here won’ let me write one word then trail off into the sunset….
if it ain’t one thing its a nuther.
California can bankrupt DEI insurers as easily it wipes out any other insurers. The more the DEI plague expands and consolidates because of mis-education, the more the overloaded society crumbles. Hello, Cloward and Piven.
DEI must be rooted completely out of the public academic and private sectors
My quick wit seems to always make people laugh which often surprises me.. I find little really good wit these days. However, as a wit afficionado, I find this article is pure gold nailing both presentation and subject matter.
You may have just surpassed Spencer as my fave!