Good news, oppressed peoples, you will no longer feel alienated by having to see a Trader Gitottos label on vegetarian pizza that no actual Italian would touch with a ten foot spatula.

Back when I used to shop at Trader Joe’s, I would do a bit of a double take at labels like Trader Jose, not because I was offended, but because a chain that largely caters to leftist children hadn’t realized that this cutesy routine was making it into a target.

But now the reality of targeting a customer base with the emotional maturity of 3-year-old Communists has caught up to it.

Responding to calls for Trader Joe’s to stop labeling its international food products with ethnic-sounding names, the grocery store chain said it has been in a years long process of repackaging those products and will soon complete the work.

In the latest call to re-name racially-charged brands and logos, nearly 1,000 people have signed an online petition urging the retail giant to rename products labeled “Trader Ming’s,” “Trader José,” or “Trader Giotto’s” to refer to Chinese, Mexican or Italian food, respectively, SFGate reported.

The petition said the labels perpetuate harmful stereotypes.

What harmful stereotypes? Don’t ask because there won’t be any explanation except a long whine.

“The Trader Joe’s branding is racist because it exoticizes other cultures – it presents ‘Joe’ as the default ‘normal’ and the other characters falling outside of it – they are ‘Arabian Joe,’ ‘Trader José,’ and ‘Trader Joe San,’ the petition states.

It’s America. Joe is the default. The whole reason that Americans eat terrible ethnic foods from other cultures (or more accurately foods they imagine to be from other cultures) is that they think they’re exotic. And so is the food poisoning they bring.

Get rid of the exoticism and 90% of the marketplace disappears.