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[Order Jason D. Hill’s forthcoming book, Letters to God From a Former Atheist, HERE.]
In the beginning are first memories, the crucibles in which personal identity is forged, accepted, or rejected. My two earliest memories left me feeling different from other children because I never imagined other children’s memories at age six were of a man lying on top of them, forcing their mouths open with a large tongue and biting their tiny lips until they bled.
Neither did I think of a mother weeping with tears formed like perfect blocks of crystal falling from a well made-up face into a plate of steaming rice and black beans could have been a memory that other children clung to as a source of love the way I did. Only I could stop her from weeping and make the face, twisted by agony, transform into a smiling work of art.
The man who sexually molested me was a gentle person. He smiled afterwards and held me close to him. He quietly told me not to tell anyone. I believed that I had made him happy. Breaking the bond of confidentiality would destroy that happiness. The belief kept the shame and humiliation at bay.
A few months later, I put a plastic bag over my face and watched myself suffocate in front of a full-length Victorian mirror. Sobbing hysterically underneath the bag, I ripped it off and collapsed to the floor, a crumpled heap of what felt like useless trash.
I held these memories without telling anyone of them until a few months ago.
My next memories are of my father, who suffered from schizophrenia, doting on me from about the age of seven, after my parents’ divorce. He always cradled me in a most unusual way; not in any way inappropriate, but in a manner that made me feel safe and strong.
He once whispered to me that I would never be lonely in this world because our bond was like an eternal marriage of souls. He would never leave me. He would, he promised, always fill the void he knew I carried in me. He held my small hands in his large ones and looked deeply into my eyes as he said this. Then he kissed me on my cheek.
Later, I would think of this as emotional pedophilia. But I was also there for him. Twice when he confessed to me that he had tried to commit suicide by drowning himself, I made him promise that if I just loved him harder and a bit more, that he would stay with me. He agreed.
A few years later, just before I turned twelve, my father genuflected before me, took my hands, and told me he had to repudiate me and my brother. He was now married to Christ. He could no longer be a father to me, he said. I would, perhaps, never see him again. I cried every night for the next five years.
During these times and to this day my mother leaned heavily upon me for emotional support. I was her confidante. I held my own emotional pain in silence while I tended to hers and brought relief to her suffering.
The message I received from my mother was: Love me, but never leave me. I dated girls in my teenage years and even had sex with some of them; however, I cannot honestly say that I felt free to love another woman in my life. It began to feel like a betrayal of my mother when I made attempts to do so.
All my life until now, I believed that I was born a homosexual. The idea that I could have been constructed as one from pathological childhood conditions never crossed my mind. In years of psychotherapy, the thought that my molestation, parental abandonment, and being a parentified child could be responsible for my homosexuality was verboten.
So, what changed? I was raised as a religious child. Approaching the age of twenty, however, I discovered philosophy and the power of reason, which became an absolute. I became an intransigent atheist for the next two decades. My mother, brother, maternal grandmother, and I emigrated to the United States from Jamaica when I was twenty.
I went on to achieve all the goals that I had established for myself. I earned a Ph.D. in philosophy, went on to write several books, gave lectures on my ideas all over the world, including America, and became a full professor of philosophy shortly after turning forty-five years old.
I also spent almost fourteen glorious years happily in love with a man eight years my senior with whom I intended to spend the rest of my life. But during all these achievements a void in me kept widening. I experienced episodic moments of happiness. But an insatiable emptiness filled my soul.
Around twenty years ago, I decided atheism was no longer an option. I began praying to the Lord for grace. I inched my way towards belief several times, only to fall into the abysmal pit of agnosticism and atheism. Need was not belief. I just could not will myself into believing in God.
In the end, broken and metaphysically exhausted, I cried out for grace in desperation and, shortly thereafter, I had a rapturous conversion experience. After a lifetime of rejecting God, He chose me. I renounced my gay lifestyle and since then have taken a vow of chastity. That was around two years ago.
Surrendering to God granted me freedom from the endless pursuit of love from another man. It opened a space inside of me that filled with a deeper and greater love. Gradually my physical attraction to men dissipated, much to the amusement of some friends. The thought of a relationship with another man ceased holding interest for me. Celibacy seemed like an eternal reprieve from chaos, and a life that was more aligned with the will of God.
I began to think more consciously of my sexual molestation. The details had always been seared in my memory, but I had trivialized their significance. If, simultaneously, one felt safe and protected by one’s molester, the damage is inestimable. I felt shame and embarrassment. The taste of blood lingered in my mouth for two days after.
This person, part of our household staff, took me for walks, hugged me, and often threw me up in the air and caught me before I fell in a delightful manner into his arms. Could it have been love that a lonely child was feeling?
Who was I before the world told me what I had to become? Who was I before alien forces shaped me into something antipodal to who I was originally? That is, a consecrated being stamped with the imprimatur of God’s perfection from the moment of conception in my mother’s womb.
******
Homosexuals, I now remain convinced, are made—not born. Many claim they knew they were different from their earliest memories. But the question remains: what unconscious forces and undetected phenomena forged the foundations of a sexual orientation?
I have never in my life met a gay man who hailed from a home with a strong bond with his father. I have never met a gay man who was not in some form of emotional partnership with his mother all his life. I have rarely met a gay man who was not promiscuous.
Polyamory and promiscuity constitute gay culture. Monogamy is a rarity. That most gay men act like sexual addicts is not some dirty secret in the gay world. For homosexual relationships, the meaning of “committed” or “monogamous” means something radically different than in heterosexual marriage.
In all the studies I looked at, including Pew Research Center Studies, 43 percent of all gay men in Western democracies claimed to have had more than 500 partners in their lifetime, and nearly 30 percent claimed more than 1,000. Fifty percent of all gay male marriages in the United States begin as open relationships where men continue to have sex with other men on the side.
The unconscious political and empathic motivations of progressive heterosexuals who support gay marriage stem from, I believe, a drive to legitimize, tame, and conquer the gay sexual imagination.
The truth is that the rampant promiscuity in gay male culture transcends the human desire for novelty. It is rooted in brokenness and despairing emptiness, in the loss of deep human connection to a parental figure, and to trauma. A relentless pursuit of sex betrays intractable pathologies at the heart of gay sexual orientation.
I write from a lifetime of observation and deep introspection. One must cease the rebellion in one’s heart and accept that traditional marriage and heteronormativity are the natural ordering of the universe. Heteronormativity is the concept that human beings fall into distinct and complementary sexes and genders (man and woman) with natural roles in their respective lives. It postulates that heterosexuality must be the norm, and that sexual and marital relations are only fitting between people of opposite sexes.
Gay sex as a lifelong activity even if practiced within the registers of legalized marriage has never been the norm historically and will never be the norm. It cannot be because it abolishes the regenerative principle of biological procreation.
Heteronormativity is the normative standard of an objective sexual reality because it is the only regenerative means by which mores, norms, values, principles and, therefore, a rational civilization are possible. And a civilization is the only social milieu in which any human being can matriculate as human rather than as an animal or some social monstrosity.
If civilization were left exclusively in the hands of gay men and heterosexuals were eliminated from the earth, it is not only obvious that the species would die off; what is less obvious is this: we would live in a state of moral ferality.
This is because the evolutionary basis for morality stems from an ethic of care from which the procreative impulse, centered on care for the helpless young, emerges. When one’s personal identity and rational self-interest are tied to protecting one’s young and one accepts that morality is a code of values that secures human well-being, then one’s sexual identity is in some sense undoubtedly a pre-foundational precursor to a moral identity.
This is not easy for someone who once had a deeply rooted gay identity to admit. It is, however, the truth. So long as gays believe they are born that way, then there is no incentive to form a moral covenant with themselves to explore their brokenness and repressed trauma. Theirs is a crisis of meaning with questions that demand answers – questions such as: How do I get beyond a life focused on sex? How do I procure an understanding of the trauma and the calamity of my past that fuel my current non-regenerative behavior?
The endless series of hookups in gay life—hence the ubiquitous description in gay profiles: looking to play—is arrested development. It is redolent of a child’s endless indulgence in a world of romps. This is antithetical to the achievement of sustained love gay men claim to be looking for.
These endless hookups and cruising for sex are repetitive efforts to make an empathic union with an emotionally lost parent. In the case of molestation, hookups are an attempt to neutralize the repressed pain, shame and humiliation inflicted by one’s abuser by eroticizing and internalizing the abuse. If one owns it, so goes the unconscious belief, one has minimized the evisceration of one’s dignity. But that is never the case.
******
I prescribe no foolproof solutions for those who face the void and the abyss. Each must make his way out of it. I suspect disabusing oneself of the shibboleths and mythologies that cloak one’s childhood, and mourning and grieving for the disowned self might be a place to start.
For me, surrendering to God, and praying that His will and plan for my life supersede my own temporal needs and desires, were the places to begin my journey. The renunciation of my homosexuality and living a chaste life has brought me a peace and joy I could not have imagined. I am filled with plenitude and a simplicity of being that manifests itself in pure stillness.
There is no longing, no ache for another, no desire for flesh that can only lead to a crumpled heap of brokenness with zero knowledge of which way to go. Now there is only a continuous light, equanimity, and moral freedom. They have brought me back to myself. For the first time in my life, I can say: I am free. And I have come home—at last.
Many heterosexual men are promiscuous too and many of those that are not would be if they could be, but the nature of heterosexual women is the barrier.
It is heterosexual women, much more than men, who have a deep emotional, biological, physical, need to tie love to sex, tie exclusivity and monogamy to sex, that stops most heterosexual men from being able to have sex with as many women as they really want to have sex with.
The desire and need to have an exclusive commitment from a provider-male has been a crucial survival necessity for the human female who must carry a fetus to term during nine, risky, months and then feed, clothe, shelter, and nurture the newborn baby for many years until the child can care for itself.
This need for commitment and love is also, in no small part, hormonal. Male to female transexuals, when they begin to take female hormones, report that an emotional, psychological change comes over them, making them more nurturing, more delicate and finer in feelings, less aggressive and competitive, more prone to crying, more maternal, needing more emotional bonding and closeness.
Female to male transexuals, when they begin to take male hormones, report the opposite emotional change. Male hormones they report, makes them more aggressive, competitive, more prone to anger and rage, less in need of emotional closeness, less in need of emotional intimacy, but more desirous of brute, physical, animal sex with as many partners as they desire.
In short, if it were not for the taming, domesticating, force of the romantic-emotional, nurturing-intimate nature of the majority of heterosexual women, heterosexual men and women would be as promiscuous as gay men.
Lesbians, I have read, are nowhere near as promiscuous as gay men, they much prefer emotional closeness and monogamy, precisely because they are by nature women, and not men.
THX as overweening psychiatrist. Is there something you would like share with the class?
Pfhh! I have no problem having sex with lots of chicks. I don’t feel guilty about it and keep doing it.
There are so many of them out there I would feel like I neglected them if I didn’t.
Three down votes? Three misogynists.
Now it’s thirteen people who hate pussy..
Sorry. I still love it.
Why do you even think of yourself as a religious conservative? LOL!
Ah! I get it!
It’s Christianity!
The Soul-Body Dichotomy.
Plus, you can always be forgiven for not striving to achieve your highest potential.
“O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet.” – Augustine
really— grab your man purse and power your nose — there is a bit of a shine — just between us guys
My fellow conservatives sometimes have trouble expressing how they really feel when it comes to these things.
There is a lot wrong with you , don’t get me wrong, but your thoughts of women are just like most men think but are afraid to admit!
I suppose it wouldn’t occur to you that some of those down votes are female. Believe it or not, we women don’t appreciated being reduced to objects that exist for your personal momentary satisfaction.
Grow up, douche bag.
There are particular rules for human behavior. Violators are constantly beset with drama and conflict, especially when the chickens begin to come home to roost.
As a pattern for living, The Ten Commandments have never been improved upon. They serve as teachers and directors to redemption through Christ for the faithful and guards for the wider secular society.
I actually appreciate your honesty! I get that from previous posts you are actually a bonafide azzhole, you know, wishing people dead and stuff.
But hey, you tell it like it is sometimes!
I actually appreciate your honesty! I get that from previous posts you are actually a bonafide azzhole, you know, wishing people dead and stuff.
But hey, you tell it like it is sometimes! I know the feeling, hurt some chix by leaving them out!
“Lesbians, I have read, are nowhere near as promiscuous as gay men, they much prefer emotional closeness and monogamy, precisely because they are by nature women, and not men.”
So true.
Back when gay marriage was being considered, Jonah Goldberg wrote a funny but very true article about it. he pointed out that one of the main arguments being used to rally support from conservatives was that marriage civilizes men (makes them less promiscuous), so conservatives should support it. He went on to tell little story.
He said that the girl he was living with (who later became his wife) had been gone on a trip for a week or so. He was at the point where he was ready to eat anything that wasn’t moving. He even referenced the college men’s guide for living by saying “it is always good to move the dishes before pissing in the sink.” He ended by declaring “Without women, men are Rugby players.”
His point was that it wasn’t really MARRIAGE that civilized men. It’s WOMEN who do.
If THAT is the case, then this “argument” for gay marriage falls apart.
THX providing oxymoronic definitive conjecture, conveniently leaving out huge swathes of human experience namely the spiritual in relationship with God the Creator and Sustainer. The created human being is a whole lot more than just a mechanical apparatus controlled by the tides of hormones
Leave it to THX to dodge this courageous self-revealing essay with off-topic comments.
God bless you, Dr. Hill, for your humility and clarity.
Correction: women have more sex partners than men. women are way more promiscuous.
There is a story of President Calvin Coolidge and his wife visiting a farm, about a rooster and his hens. From whence the neologism “Coolidge Effect” comes from.
Origin of the term
In a 1974 letter,[9] behavioral endocrinologist Frank A. Beach claims to have introduced the term “Coolidge effect” in either 1958 or 1959.[10] He attributed the neologism to an old joke about Calvin Coolidge when he was President of the United States.[11]
The President and Mrs. Coolidge were being shown [separately] around an experimental government farm. When [Mrs. Coolidge] came to the chicken yard she noticed that a rooster was mating very frequently. She asked the attendant how often that happened and was told, “Dozens of times each day.” Mrs. Coolidge said, “Tell that to the President when he comes by.” Upon being told, the President asked, “Same hen every time?” The reply was, “Oh, no, Mr. President, a different hen every time.” President: “Tell that to Mrs. Coolidge.”
The joke appears in a 1972 book (Aggression in Man and Animals, by Roger N. Johnson, p. 94).[12]” – Wikipedia
If there’s one thing that is very difficult to change is sexual preferences, fetishes, fantasies, desires, habits.
I have never read of any kind of cure for pedophilia. Which leads me to believe there is as yet no cure for homosexuality either. Maybe one day, but not right now.
Sexual fetishes are vastly more common among men than women.
There are vastly more men who rape women than women who rape men, as a matter of fact, I’ve never heard of a woman raping a man, at least from sexual desire. But then again women don’t have to, even an ugly woman can find a willing partner at a bar.
THX sez: “I am not a psychiatrist but I play a failed one on a comment board.”
Just what we do not need to hear…………your thoughts on deviant sex. Speaks volumes about you.
I see you have a few of your buddies giving you upvotes and me downvotes. Is it always 5?
Astonishing and wonderful article. Thank you for your honesty and for saying so openly what many of us heterosexuals have suspected but couldn’t know for sure. I hope many people find inspiration in your story and can heal themselves from whatever angst they may carry around
Thank you for using the word “heal” rather than “cure.”
Agree, Great article.
One can generalize the author’s thoughts snd experiences to the culture at large and including many heterosexuals. Not to mention the current bizarre obsession with changing genders, especially of children.
Jason, I’ve been reading your essays for years. Your philosophical insights have been extremely valuable and I wish blessings for you in your spiritual path. Thank you for your service to our society and nation.
Thanks for your kind words. They mean much to me
Jason is a treasure – I too have been reading and following him , listening closely as he teaches us about advocacy for Israel, which he has based on academic research and deep commitment to morality and has always indicated that he was on a journey of personal growth . Indeed, I have felt at times that I was reading the work of a friend . He has been harassed and antagonized for his moral views within the academic world and so I pray that this essay – this truth- will not be attacked and though it most likely will- let’s be a support for his clear vision and brave voice ! Kavod and kudos Jason!
I am a minister who has prayed and ministered to a number of gay men. Like the author, all of them had been violated as children and abandoned in some respect by their same sex parent. There was early trauma, early sexualization. No one helped them gain their male identity. On the plus side, I fully believe that the Lord has come to heal the brokenhearted and set the captives free. We minister to the sources of trauma, also forgiveness, breaking generational curses, breaking ungodly soul ties, perhaps with many people, dealing with the demonic and more. i believe the Lord can also accelerate growth and fill in a lost identity. It is a process and not overnight, but there has to be levels of ministry, and i believe it takes the power of God. It is not just a natural problem but has spiritual dimensions. Wounds can and are healed. Lives are reset. Many people say they are born that way. Jesus says you must be born again. For everyone.
May God bless your ministry.
Very touching. I appreciate your truthfulness.
Damn, Hill, you’ve had a rough childhood and earlier life. It’s a good thing you found God.
Whoever down voted me sucks asses.
I have to admit I’ve had a chick do that to me, though. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I actually liked it.
Four down votes? I see there are four ass lickers here. Probably all homos.
Wow.
Thank you for your honesty, I too was abused and confused by it all, but I didn’t have the relationship with my mother so ended up straight and normal with a beautiful wife and daughters. but still tormented at times but never succumbed.
The fact you did not succumb is good. Nevertheless, abuse during childhood innocence lays down permanent tracks upon the soul. Some more, some less. Redemption is for you, too.
“When one’s personal identity and rational self-interest are tied to protecting one’s young and one accepts that morality is a code of values that secures human well-being, then one’s sexual identity is in some sense undoubtedly a pre-foundational precursor to a moral identity.”
This one sentence could be explored almost ad infinitum. All said there is undoubtedly true. Marriage also has moral and civilizational good beyond the procreational power of the married couple. Men and women were made for one another.
The truth that homosexuals are made, not born, is loudly proclaimed by the San Francisco Gay Choir’s performance of their song “We’ll Convert Your Children.” Still available on YouTube.
That is a deeply disturbing performance. Those guys are evil.
Dr. Hill, You might enjoy the free Hillsdale College lecture series about C.S. Lewis and Christianity. Your journey to faith sounds very similar to his. C.S. Lewis, like you, spent many years as a philosopher opposed the mythology of Christ, and believed Christianity was no different from other myths (which he greatly enjoyed). He struggled mightily with faith and was overcome by despair, trying to produce the correct posture, thoughts, approach, thoughts, etc. to God.
If you are interested, go to https://online.hillsdale.edu/courses and choose the one entitled “C.S. Lewis on Christianity.” I think you might find it corresponds to your own experiences as well as very encouraging. You have much in common with that great man.
Very compelling and moving testimony. I have wondered about what constitutes sexual morality with the so-called “LGBTQ” culture. Matthew Vines (God and the Gay Christian), in his case for churches blessing same-sex marriage, insists on “monogamy” as the standard. But why should it be? Jason Hill suggests that in this regard we run into the familiar problem of the re-definition of words, that the concept doesn’t mean the same thing in that culture. This is a very courageous statement by Professor Hill, especially coming from someone in the academic culture. Don’t look for his perspectives to be considered in the “Inclusion” contexts of DEI totalitarianism!
What strength and courage to face and tell the truth!
We now live in a culture finding an endless array of nefarious means to provide tacit approval for an ever-expanding array of sexually deviant behavior. That G-d designed our male and female bodies to engage in the act of sexual intimacy by embracing the physical, emotional and spiritual elements of our being in what is to be a unified act of intense pleasure and communion, mankind has sought to degrade into that which often seeks to demean one or both parties involved. Such copulation provides a fleeting moment of pleasure originally designed as a spiritual communion between beloveds with the potential for the creation of new life.
The sexual abuse of children is that which negates, in totality, the intrinsic value of individual life. At the very moment when the pristine innocence of a child is subverted by adults, claiming for themselves pleasures derived by violating the very essence of another human being, the foundation for and justification of the furtherance of depravity has been dictated. That children, who have no choice in both their innocence and helplessness, to defend against such sexual onslaughts should be a number 1 priority. Yet our culture, rapidly descending into evil pursuits, now has managed to create children as a commodity to be sexually used, profited from, violated again and the child is left to adapt to that which is in no way nurturing and protective and they are very alone. The encroaching cultural acceptance of child sexual abuse, attempting to reframe this inherently maladaptive sexual abomination as “minor attracted person”, provides avenues of repulsive acts to which all children will be vulnerable. Those for whom this complete disregard has already happened struggle to find an identity balanced in a crucible from which evil has been their greatest influence. It is a silent suffering only those who have lived through it can begin to understand.
I strongly disagree with Dr. Hill’s blanket assertion that homosexuals are made, not born.. While there may well be individuals whose sexual orientation was shaped by such factors as abuse, molestation, and abandonment, I believe there is strong evidence to support the argument that many homosexuals (both male and female) are in fact born with this sexual orientation.. I remember, as a child in elementary school, boys in first or second grade who were oddly effeminate in speech, actions, etc. They all were clearly homosexual as adults, most eventually acknowledging their homosexual publicly. When I was a kid, it was not normative for girls to be involved in athletics, but there were a few who zealously pursued various athletic activities. They were more than “tomboys.” They eschewed close friendships with boys, and were very and deliberately non-feminine. Most of those I knew became open lesbians as adults, although a few opted to conceal their obvious lesbianism by, for example, adopting children with no co-parent.
Dr. Hill, I think, is guilty of projection. He assumes that other homosexuals have all experienced traumas and events similar to those he endured, without evidence. Finally, he acknowledges that heterosexual marriage is the only morally and rationally sound type of relationship, since it promotes procreation and optimal conditions for child rearing (I essentially concur), but then, astonishingly, proudly declares his intention to remain celebate for life, announcing that he feels, for once,, liberated. So Dr. Hill publicly confesses his inability to form lasting intimacy with any woman. I suspect this is because he has no sexual attraction to women. He’s quite a mess, in my estimation.
Do you have a pre-commitment to the idea that homosexuals are born that way?
That would explain your weak argumentation against overwhelming evidence to the contrary. Dr. Hill’s personal experience in no way qualifies as “projection” when it is confirmed by the overwhelming majority of homosexuals AND the absence of any data to support your preferred thesis other than exceptions that do not prove the rule. NAXALT (“Not All ‘X’ Are Like That) is not probative of the general rule. There are effeminate men and masculine women who are decidedly heterosexual, and we do not know their childhood history, either.
Your say, “So Dr. Hill publicly confesses his inability to form lasting intimacy with any woman. I suspect this is because he has no sexual attraction to women. He’s quite a mess, in my estimation.”
The absence of sexual attraction to the opposite sex does not define the category of being “a mess.” There are lots of people who are messes with opposite sex attraction. Dr. Hill has been redeemed and has found peace and freedom in a way that is not grounded in your category. His is the better way and in no way makes him a mess. He is beautiful. God bless Him and give him a heritage, establishing the work of his life.
Thanks for your reply.to my comment. Are you aware that numerous studies on homosexuality within families and between identical twins support the presence of hereditary factors (i.e. gene complexes) that are contributing determinants of homosexual behavior? Hill states that he has never met any male adult homosexual who had a close relationship with the father. But what accounts for that? Could it be that at least some of these fathers perceived that their sons were probably homosexual due to their behavior or appearance, and found them repulsive, preventing any close father-son bonding? And Dr. Hill, no matter how many gay men with whom he has discussed this matter, can never interview the numberless other gay men he never met and will never meet,whose relationships with their fathers may have been nurturing, close, and accepting. You also seem to have failed to note the irony of Hill’s decision to embrace celibacy in the service of God. That’s exactly what his father did, with devastating consequences for Hill. Does Hill even grasp that he has chosen to follow his father’s path, which Hill, understandably, deems pathological?
I can go on, but I won’t.
I am aware of those studies, and I find them to be a desperate search for a mythical gay gene that does not exist. The link between childhood sexual trauma and homosexuality is undeniable. No study can crafted to destroy that truth.
Dr. Hill’s father’s “celibacy in service of God” alone is nothing compared to the devastating consequences of his severe psychosis, his abandonment of his wife and son, and his “emotional pedophilia.”
He’s not saying that ALL are made, nobody knows and nobody ever will know. No amount of university research will ever discover the truth, how many kids were abused as babies and therefore have no direct memories that they could tell to the researchers.
How many researchers start with the assumption that ALL gays are born?
One need only look at the anatomical order of the human body to understand that using the orifice specifically designed for the removal of excrement as a sexual entry point is inherently abnormal. Providing cultural approval for this behavior is to jettison the biological markers of sexual identity and our individual and cultural sanity.
In a world with over 8 billion people there are forms of genetic mutation that cause numerous issues for individuals identified as having them and they must address its impact on their lives. While a compassionate society will seek to understand and provide support, a healthy society will not underwrite the total destruction of biologically determined sexual identity by accepting homosexuality as normative behavior. That our cultural affirmation has reached such a point that we are now also rapidly assimilating yet additional sexual identity abnormalities as “normal” should be a red-flag warning!
All healthy societies are built on the foundation of normally functioning male/ female pairing and reproduction and to entertain otherwise is to underwrite its malevolent destruction.
Thanks for sharing your insights and your struggles, ason. I admire your tenacity and your commitment to Christ.
I Corinthians 1:11
Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord.
@TomJarman1979
Mr. Jarman, of course the scripture is true, but marriage is not given to every man and woman. The childless, unmarried man is given hope and comfort: Isaiah 56:5
“To them I will give in My house and within My walls a memorial,
And a name better than that of sons and daughters;
I will give them an everlasting name which will not be cut off.”
And there are unmarried men like Jeremiah and Paul who were precious in the eyes of the LORD.
The barren woman also is given joy and blessing in Isaiah 54: 1- 8.
Yes, God’s plan is for man and woman to marry and have children, but that plan is not without exception and the exceptions also receive blessing.
Thanks for sharing your insights and your struggles, Jason. I admire your tenacity and your commitment to Christ.
I Corinthians 1:11
Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord.
@TomJarman1979
This is an important subject. I had long believed that homosexuality somehow came out of the genetic shuffle during conception. I’m thinking more and more that trauma and parental relationships is a very compelling point.
Thank you very much for this article. While our culture is being challenged like never before it is more important than ever that we understand these things lest we be over run by the lunatics who want transform society.
As long as everyone votes for President Trump in November 5 — all this stress from inflation, open borders, wars, lawlessness, law fare, pushing gay agendas onto elementary to high school children, 2 year shut down and all the lies and misinformation — that’s enough to make anyone kookoo unless we have strong faith in YHVH — people don’t believe that —
Frankly gay relationships rarely mate for life and for that matter, heterosexual marriages still break off because people need something bigger and real outside of themselves to believe to make us strong
So if it’s a tweaking of the childhood development that results in being gay — so does peer rejection for those children not learned to socialize because of dysfunctional homes –
Now let us not forget the hermaphrodites among us — these are people born with both genetilia , neither fully developed. What are they supposed to do for love in their life?
The rest is fractured pysche —
To accept Christ in your life is to have freedom NOT to sin, Christ’s love is enough!
Regardless of their ‘letter’, all rainbow alphabets have two things in common. They create an imaginary world having no moral code and they are obsessed with the next sexual ‘adventure’. Further, those conflicted by unrelieved guilt will invent a god to affirm their miscreant life..
Dr. Hill, you show a great deal of moral courage to “come out” the way you have, considering that you are an academic. May G0d continue to bless you and may your relationship with Him fill you with love and warmth for the rest of your life. And may those of your colleagues, especially the left-wing heterosexuals, who disapprove of your words simply be ignored as irrelevant.
The author refers to early child development in the context of sexual experience. As a retired Sheriff Dept employee who worked in jails, prisons, and institutions, I processed thousands of arrest reports, medical-psychological workups, criminal and social history, investigative, pre trial and sentencing reports and I can concur with what Professor Hill wrote. These early encounters are indeed the setup for adult behaviors in almost every instance. May God bless you and keep you on the road to self actualization and fulfillment. I used to listen to your podcast. I miss it.
Great article. It gives heterosexual people an inside view and an example of a personal experience. It does not dismiss arguments that some people might be born gay, but it testifies that many might not. As homosexuality is highly politicized, this voice is worth spreading.
More than 20 years ago I worked in a Gannett newspaper’s newsroom. I got to be friends with a young man that I worked with and we talked about many things. At some point I told him that I didn’t believe gays were born that way, or that they choose it. I told him it was something CREATED by dysfunctional family relationships.
When I found out later in the day that my friend was gay I went and apologized to him. He asked me WHY I was apologizing. I told him I didn’t want to offend him. He said “You don’t offend me, I think you are right.” After meeting his parents and talking more with him I KNEW that I was right.
I gave him this book to read…
https://ignatius.com/the-battle-for-normality-bnstp/
He called me later and told me it was the most logical book he’d ever read on homosexuality (and he had a LIBRARY of pro-gay books).
AFTER reading the book he married another man in New York City. That marriage fell apart and eventually he ended up dating women. As of today he’s living with a woman and things appear to be going well for him.
Thank you for this article. There is MUCH truth in it.
In birds such ducks, geese, parrots, there is a period of imprinting where the chick develops a relationship with its mother. It lasts about 2 weeks in ducks. They then follw her in a row. If it doesn’t find its mother it can imprint upon anything else, including people. They then cannot develop a bond with their own species. People form pair bonds with their mother in early life. Could sexuality also be determined in this way? I think so. Charles Blow is a brilliant journalist who is bisexual. In an interview with Michelle Martin he said he’d been molested at age 7 by a cousin whom he had idolized. The disgust turned inward, causing self-loathing and intense psychological pain. Later that pain was adjusted somewhat by ascribing the bisexuality to a pre-existing inclination, which his cousin discovered through “diabolic giftedness”. I think that unlikely. He just can’t acknowledge that something so important as personal sexuality could be determined through a violent ugly crime. A type of imprinted PTSD. It’s very unfortunate that ugly memories cannot simply be erased.
I’m old enough to remember the universal worry about AIDS in the 80’s. I read an article back then written by a psychiatrist who was looking after these AIDS patients. He commented that not one was brought up with their fathers and lesbians were not usually brought up by their mothers. It was his opinion that homosexuals were forever searching for that same sex parent which was manifested in promiscuity, for the males, at least.
I’ve come to believe all humans are capable of having sex with any other human, even the same sex—-it’s called sin. Just like adultery, we could all indulge but most of us don’t. We decide not to for various reasons.
Scripture tells us God forbids sex with one’s own gender. A loving God wouldn’t say that if homosexuals were born that way and couldn’t help it. I heard many ‘gays’ say no one is born that way really.
What a pity we’ve changed marriage laws in the western world to accommodate something often brought about by abuse.